CrystalRose and others...I have had to explain, get books, beg, cry for understanding so I won't go over that part in this format..I have a great husband but tonight was very sad and difficult..I hurt like hell tonight when he came home..worse than giving birth..I cooked dinner and just couldn't stand up another minute...for some reason, this evening he got upset because we didn't kiss much anymore..he felt like I didn't care for him...shock for me...I actually started to cry and spent an hour talking about how much pain pushed away almost everything especially kissing (we're both 58)..I don't want to make-out on the couch when I feel like I need morphine..why don't our family members, especially the ones we are intimate with get this..tonight I didn't want a man in my life for the first time..I wanted to say just leave..he's never had surgery, an accident or any type of injury that would cause pain..he is really my fiancee of two years but I've known him for 40...I felt like shit..I felt guilty..bad...all those lousy things...anyone else having the same experience..I just want to be held and told it's okay...I don't want to take care and be responsible for the insecurities of grown man..I do things all the time to show him how I care..doesn't that count more than kissing for hours? I want to scream..And why won't he/they read the books we give them to learn how to help and support us..I hate it..
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