So today was the work day from HELL. And I didn't even almost pass out, and it wasn't my 11 hour day (that's tomorrow...can't freaking wait). My manager gave me a written warning for a number of things: cell phone use (which was fair, I have been caught with it a few times); "improper dress code"-which means that I work in probably the only vet's office in the country that won't buy lint rollers and won't turn on the heat, so I either freeze or wear a jacket and use tape to get all the hair off; and a decline in performance (they are well aware of what I have, I was just diagnosed last month). I also got blamed for an incident last week where a client left the practice because her dog freaked out when we tried to draw its blood-I'm not saying I did nothing wrong, maybe I did, but I wasn't the only one involved. The owner also mentioned something that happened a few weeks ago with a different dog which I wasn't involved with. And, since the "flow" of appointments on Friday hasn't been good, it must be my doing, and not the doctor who is physically incapable of moving faster than a snail's pace (half the time on Fridays I end up taking in most of the appointments because the other vet tech that is supposed to help me is on the phone). But all of that is nothing compared to what came next:

Because of the Friday thing, they took me off the schedule that day until further notice. They didn't replace those 8 hours anywhere else in the week. So that's going to cost me about $107 in net pay PER WEEK. That's $450 a month! Things are tight as it is, how the hell am I supposed to make up that much money?? And because that wasn't shitty enough, they told me that all the technicians would have to take a "skills test" which apparently is some combination of a written exam and a practical assessment. This will affect my pay as well if I don't do well, meaning that I could lose EVEN MORE money. And finally, if my performance doesn't "improve" (I did not get a clear definition of what that means), this is my final (only) warning-I can be fired at the drop of a hat. Needless to say I came home bawling and practically having a panic attack..

And, my boss (the owner of the practice) was conveniently not present during this meeting-she made a point of running out to do errands. The manager who issued the warning, I have never seen her do anything besides Facebook, she doesn't even try to hide it. The head technician, who was also there, sits on her ass and talks to the receptionists all day because she's "ordering supplies" (hard to do when you're leaning back with your hands behind your head and your eyes closed). Now I'm not saying I'm perfect, I'm not, but I try really damn hard. And I knew there were double standards and drama and all, but I never saw something like this coming...and I have no idea what to do. My boyfriend says he'll help, but he doesn't have that much extra money.

I was saying a couple weeks ago how I wish I could afford to work part time, but I never wanted it like this. Everything kinda feels hopeless right now, and I'm praying to whatever deity might be up there that this somehow doesn't completely f**k up my life. Sorry for the really long rant but I had to get it out somewhere...