Yes, there are men with Fibro. One is on this site and another one just Meebo's me and talks to me about his Fibro which is really bad. I know the percentages are quite different between men and women but it is not uncommon for men to suffer from it as well.
Hugs GB

I'm a guy in my 50's with fibro and it has knocked me off my feet... and job. I used to be extremely active, hking, cycling etc. Rarely date, but that has been my choice. I have had women who wanted to date me, but I'm not sure what I can handle fibro wise, nor was I ready.

I was dating a women several years back for several years. I met her before my fibro returned after being dormant for over decade. It was hard on her at times. I think it was harder than she cared to admit. Just found out recently through an old mutual friend that the fibro bug stung her about a year or so ago. I guess she now gets to live my life first hand now. I feel awful for her, yet I cannot have contact with her for sanity reasons. I wouldn't wish fibro on my worst enemy.

Instead of dating I'm involved with various Meetup.com groups. It gets me out and it's a great way to meet people. It might add to the physical pain, yet also adds to the overall sanity level.

It's weird not being able to be as active as I was and I meet so many active women. I tell my friends that I need to meet a women who is more sedated.

So yes, men suffer and we probably have the same issues as most women fibro sufferers.

When I am out there meeting people, I'm upfront and honest about what I have and my limitations. I'd never go on a date without explaining about my fibro condition beforehand. The hard thing for me is being told that I look well and always seem so happy and outgoing. Well, I'm happy and outgoing but suffer inside. I just do the best I can do with what I have and make sure have my 8-10 hours of rest time and that's not including sleeping.

Yes, according to the statistics I found, 95% of those diagnosed with FMS are women, and just 5% are men.

I would have preferred to win the lottery. :)

Yes, I have fibro & yes, it has been a major problem for me over the years. My marriage ended in large part due to me having it as mine started back in 1982 & it was rarely dx'd or even mentioned back in those days. My ex didn't even think I was sick at all.

My last girl friend also dumped me due to my illness. Just like Sprawling, I was very active all of my life but this stuff has finally laid me out so these days I just try to make it "day to day" - would love to have someone to do things with, but these days I can barely leave the house to do the things I have to do so I feel my dating days are behind me.

I have read that women are likely to have fibro 9 to 14 times more than men but I will say it is just as bad for us as it is for you & in someways it may be worse. When you are 6'4" big guy who appears healthy on the outside, people don't understand why somedays you can't walk to your mailbox to check your mail due to the pain.

One thing, for sure, fibro doesn't play favors when it comes to sex.

Best wishes to all.

Thank you for your replies, I can see that it might very well be a mistake for me to be in a relationship in my eyes. I don't want to have to "teach" someone about fibro, and no one really knows until they have it. Thanks to all! j

Despite all, I wouldn't just hand in the towel about being in a relationship. There are people out there that will accept us for who we are and what we have. We also must do our part and mirror those same traits in return.

I'm not saying it will be easy, but the alternative is to live life by yourself. I for one am not ready to do that yet. On the other hand I'm not running out to just be with anyone. I use my energy to just get out and do a social event every couple of weeks. Like I mentioned before, Meetup.com has a wide variety of social activity groups in most major cities. Even if you can just attend a card game for an hour or two it's worth it.

Hi Curly, just had to stop and say I love your pic!! Makes me feel better just sitting here in bed seeing it. Thank u! Blessings, Jo

Hi curlykraut!

I have met men in person with fibro and (after my horrible break up w/ my X) I even tried to date one thinking that he would be more understanding. It turned out that dating a fibro guy while I myself having fibro was pretty overwhelming. Managing my pain and then learning about a totally new person's pain (even though the same condition) and managing his, too, was way too hard.

Anyways.... i'm glad you are curious about getting back into the dating world. It can be fun actually, despite having fibro. So don't just give up and quit because you think of your self as a burden only.

Meeting people and hanging out with them (when you feel up to it) is a healthy social activity. Of course, make sur they are activities that you can handle. If they suggest things you can't do simply explain that you have chronic pain and have to take it easy. Let the guy get to you know you, the you behind the pain. And with each visit you can explain a little more about fibro. But bu sure not to dump it all out on him at one time. If the guy wants a few days to process what you have told him over it is always wise to let him have it. some men will bounce right back and continue to spend time with you. Others will not be able to handle it. Not all can.

When I found Jeff (the guy that recently married me) I had to explain things to him a little bit at a time over time. And every time I did, I asked him if he still wanted to continue seeing me. Sometimes he did need a few days to think about it, but he always bounced back. Eventually when he felt like he wanted to serious with me, I sat him down with a fibromyalgia book and told him to read it. I said that he has to know what he is getting him self into before we get serious. So he did. I thought I was going to lose him but to my surprise he popped the question and we married a month later.

People complete each other in different ways. Each couple has their own unique way of balancing each other out. You just have to find the right guy for you and that you are right for each other. Even with your fibro, you can still be perfect for someone. You can still be the person of their dreams (with out doing jumping jacks, running marathons, or building a pyramid for them). And you both will find ways to fulfill each others lives. Trust me.

I say go for it and don't ever feel like you are less of a person or not good enough. You deserve to be loved.

Hi and thanks so much for your replies, I feel better equipped to start dating. I definitely don't want to be alone for the rest of my life. Bluesun you give me so much hope that it is possible to find someone that will be able to accept me for me. How is your fibro? Do you still have very bad days? What kind of activities do you guys do together? I love to go places and do things with others but I am pretty much just a rock once I get there. I can converse and laugh and give moral support, but like when camping, I don't help cause I can't. Do you have issues like this in your marriage? Julie

Hi there. I am a 40 year old male with severe fibro.

I used to run about 20 miles a week and a 10 mile run was easy enough to make all at once. I also was a successful music teacher with awards and accolades.

Fibro changed all of that.

That said, I have a wonderful, loving, caring girlfriend. We would be married, but that would destabilize both our incomes (long story dealing with disability income).

We were together prior to fibro hitting. We have made many, many adjustments and went through a tremendously difficult time that almost caused us to split.

We were creative. We have our "dates" in the middle of the day when I am most able to be active. We split up housework differently and, in some cases, just have to recognize that the house is going to be a little more chaotic once in a while. We do short grocery trips more often as that is easier for me.

We will never be rich and have a ton of nice stuff.

And we made some other personal choices to attempt to allow us to live a good life together.

That said, remember that fibro does not define you. It is a condition you have. You are still the same person inside and that is what counts. The right person for you will recognize that.

I am grateful for the love and support of another person. She will never truly (hopefully) understand what I go through, but she loves me and I love her and that is what matters to us.

Good luck! I hope you find what you are looking for.

I used to go camping a lot before all this happened to me. I used to hike all the time too. I'm sure if I found a good spot I would try to camp, but Jeff isn't into sleeping out side and things. Besides, it does really hurt me. I have to find a way to solve that issue.

My husband and I like to enjoy an easy swim in the ocean, kayaking (he does most of the paddling), snorkeling, easy walks to waterfalls (along trails), sometimes I'll lay on a surf board and he'll push me around in the ocean (when I don't feel like working too hard) and he enjoys doing that, we like movies, reading together, playing a few board games, sailing on a catamaran once in a while, going for scenic drives, .... I'm sure there are a few other things I'm forgetting to mention here. lol

My fibro hasn't been too bad for the last couple of years. It's actually been pretty manageable. Sometimes I have my husband go with me to my chronic pain appts so he can talk to the docs and get a feel for what we both should be doing together. It helps a lot. Since I've gotten married it feels like managing the fibro is a team effort because we constantly share space together. It has caused him to alter his habits, especially at night. I, too, have had to get used to doing things differently because he likes different things than I do. He actually likes more pillows than I do. Never would have thought I'd meet someone like that. LOL. But it's ok, we make our adjustments and we love each other and wouldn't trade it for anything else.

You might hit a few bumps in the road during your dating experience, but I'm sure once you find someone where you 2 work together as a great team, things will start to fall in place. And then next thing you know it will feel like you fit each other like puzzle pieces lol