Well, you are, technically, 19, but if your siblings are minors, then yes, she should NOT be doing that.

Heck, even if you ARE over 18, I'd feel very uncomfortable even if a ROOMMATE brought over strange men. And this is your mom. Eeew.

I'd sit her down and tell her that what she did makes you feel VERY uncomfortable. Ask her to please not do that anymore. But don't come off too strong, or she'll feel judged.

If she respects you at all, she'll apologize and vow to not do that again.

If not, then she's in a selfish period from the impending divorce.

No matter what, document it all. How is Dad? Is he in the picture? You could always go to the judge and tell him/her about it. At 14, kids have a legal say in the courts.

Just be careful- I don't know your mom. Could she say, "If you don't like it, you can leave?" I'd hate to see you without a place... but could Dad take you in?

Bottom line: No- you are not out of line; she is. Yeah, she may feel the need to cut loose, but not at the expense of her children. Better to drop you guys off at your father's for a week or two, go on a cruise and get her ya-yas off and then come back and be a normal mom.

Hugs.

Thank you so much for your reply. Yeah my brothers are 9 and 15 right now. I know the 15 year old was very uncomfortable and unsettled about this as well. My dad is still in the picture. Actually I put in a transfer request at work 2 days ago so I can change stores to go live with him. I also still need to tell my mom about that. I'm scared to though because she's going to be very angry. She wouldn't try to kick me out, but she would be angry and upset and turn the tables to that I did something wrong or that my feelings are unreasonable. Thank you again for your reply.
Hugs!

Is this guy so much of a loser that he can't afford a hotel room or to take her to his place? She has minor children in the home for God's sake. We would hope that the Mom would have enough sense not to bring some stranger in the home, especially over night. That is how these horrendous horror stories happen.

Make your plans first, in case she kicks you out or your relationship with her breaks down. Then, yes, speak to her as a reasonable adult, not in a judgmental way, as DeliAnnem cautions. I know she is going through a divorce but she has to place her priorities first, and her "ya-yas" just don't come anywhere near the priority of providing a safe and comfortable home, physically and psychologically, for her children. You are a very mature young lady.

Our best wishes to you,
--EJ

ok....

- your mother was married a long time.
-she is enjoying dating for the first time in a long time.
-she has brought flame home and is maybe reliving her young, single days.


I think you should put your feelings to the side and try to be happy for her. If it is a rare occurance for her to bring men home, I think you should be easy on her.

My mother brought home 2 men over 2 nights after she divorced my dad. I was hurt because I love my father, but now that I'm older I find the whole situation hilarious. My mother has only slept with three men in her life.

I guess some people do out of character things, or let loose more after long term marriages.

can she "let loose" out of sight of the children?

put another way - when she "let's loose," can she not rub the children's noses in it while she is "getting her rocks off?"

lebe, did you miss the part where there's a *9* year old in the house?

Does that child need to see the morning after stank? Nasty.

Haha actually, epicjourney, neither of them have jobs and the guy lives with his parents. And she would always go out other places with guys while married to my dad, (she had many affairs and my 9 year old brother is from another guy) but now that he's out of the house she's more open about it and now that guy was here. Those horror stories that you're thinking about epic journey is exactly why I felt like it was sketchy and weird. I do see your point a little though lebe, because I think the situation angers me a lot more because I am closer to my dad so I'm bitter about the whole divorce. I really hope that my 9 year old brother didn't see anything and doesn't know what's going on, even though at his real dad's house things ae much worse. Thanks for your opinions and support guys!

Well, then if she had many affairs, then this sounds par for the course.

Sound like she thinks with her vjayjay. Sorry; you and your sibs deserve better.

She should not have done that. That is screwed up. What if that guy was a child rapist? How inconsiderate of her. That is how a lot of kids get abused is from the mothers bringing home a random man. That is so horrible of her.