Family Issues Support Group
Family issues is a huge range that go from minor conflict to major misbehaviour and even abuse on the part of individual members of the family occur. Whether you feel you are in a dysfunctional family or you're dealing with a very specific issue, this is the place to talk about it and find others who might be going through the same thing.
Hello, thank you for clicking...I really need some info. on my family/advice on what to do next? So if you are reading this I thank you from the bottom of my heart. My family, seems so broken that it will never be the same again. I overdosed and nearly died on Heroin and stole over $10,000 from my own family for the drug. I just recently am in recovery (Suboxone therapy) again for the drug...and am scared I won't ever be able to be clean again after feeling so ....badly about all that has happened. We lost a member of our family, and she now isn't even in a home but a psychiatric hospital. My mother has gone insane. My father and I don't know what to do, my dad drinks and smokes a lot and so does my mother. I get high constantly on synthetic cannabis. I am on an antidepressant and that helps a little, but not a lot. My sister is chemically dependent and shows no signs of stopping this lifestlye of partying. And I feel that because of this, I will never get to see my lost family member again because that is why we lost them in the first place. And I feel hopeless...I want to just bury my sorrow in bliss. Bliss that I can choose to create with Drugs if I chose. I am going to see a Psychologist soon, to help me sort all this out, but I really just wanted someone's take on what I should do next in my life to get by. My mom has this...issue that noone can figure out what is wrong with her, maybe you know? She say's that 5 minutes feels like 5 hours and it never stops for her. She hasn't bathed in weeks or changed her clothing...I am concerned and scared that this is what my family has become. Please reply with kindness even though the reality of my family may be ugly or silly. Thank you.
I'm just going to be to the point, but in no way am I trying to be mean, so please bear with me.
The bad new- You are a substance abuser, as is your father and mother. Your mother also has mental health issues. But you know all of this. But what you may not know is how deep it runs and how you never really had a chance- you learned what you were shown and in order to have the life you want, you have to start at square one to learn the healthy way to deal with life.
The good news- you are only 22, so you already know that this cannot go on. That's awesome. You are also smart. I can tell by how you write. Finally, I see that you are in college, so you have the potential to have a satisfying career with earning potential, so you have a way out of this hell your parents provided for you.
What to do- unfortunately, you must take some steps to cut out your toxic family... for now at least. You cannot try to get clean and mentally well adjusted if you keep the ones around who got you there in the first place. You may have to keep them at a distance forever if you need to. But for now, you really need to do this. Doesn't mean they're horrible people or you don't love them. But think of a diet- if you need to lose weight, hanging around a donut shop is not the way to go, right?
I see you are in NY. I'm in PA and I went to the Caron Foundation for a week to work on family of origin stuff. Others were there for a lot longer for more heavy substance abuse issues. I don't know the extent of your issues, but I'd call them and at least start there. They may have other resources or suggestions. But I went there and met people that had the same story as me and it was like the sky opened up and a million light bulbs went off. One week is not a cure all, but if you expose yourself and really dig and then get after care back in NY for therapy and substance abuse issues, I'm telling you, you've got a fighting chance. It's not cheap but there is FA and if you can pay for tuition, you can find the $ for this.
I've suggested this place in the past, and nobody has ever posted that they checked it out, much less said they're going to go. Please be the first one to actually tell me what they think.
Good luck and I'm happy that you took this first step in being honest and seeking help. It's the first day of going in the right direction!
Start working two or three jobs and put the money in the bank because that's the money you're going to use to pay your family off for the money you stole from them. Stealing that much money probably had a large impact on them. Making amends means you'll have to work several jobs in order to pay that money back, but working hard will hopefully keep your focus off drugs and remind you how hard and long it takes to make that much money. Don't ever steal again.
When you've completed all that, then you're ready to move on in your life and take on th world. I hope you get to that point.