I thought that way too for a good long time. I lived in a state where it was just me and my kids and a very toxic second cousin. I was a thousand miles from anyone I knew and it was really hard. I have grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and one sister that I have cut ties with. I only see them if I have no choice. Oh yeah, and my dad of course. I don't see him either and scarcely do I talk to him. Or rather, scarcely does he talk to me. I live with my mom due to the severity of the bipolar disorder, but that's really the only family I have left besides my kids and my DS family.

Hang in there, you aren't alone!

My parents were both one of two children, and my parents were much older when they had me. Both my uncle and my aunt had grandchildren older than me. And well my sister hated my guts from the day I was born (she was/ is 5 years older). Functionally, I had no family.

My ex left, and I've been raising my children alone. So I totally understand your wish for family and loneliness.

I have no answers. I tried, but was never able to get a substitute family. It's just my kids and me.

What I'll say is this. There are good things about it. My kids are mature, helpful and kind. But yes, there are still rough patches.

As Precious said, you're not alone.

That's guys for your replies, it means a lot to me. My kids are very kind and mature as well. I can see it in their eyes when they see other children with their families and it hurts. However, I know little to no family is better than being in a toxic one, and I know that from experience!

I'm in the same boat. Spent this year (and every year) alone for Thanksgiving, Xmas and now New Years. My family is completely toxic and I have cut off every single person except 1 cousin. Unlike you though I don't have kids. I don't even have that to keep me company. I am 40. Too late for kids now. And if I had them, they wouldn't have a family either besides me. Not sure how long I will be able to stand it.

What about Big Brothers or Big Sisters?... I know a couple of great people that volunteered for them and developed wonderful friendships with kids and their families.

I'm sorry you don't have a better relationship with your family... Toxic is no good... Big hug...x

It may NOT get any better... but guess what? You are being an AWESOME mom by keeping high standards with who gets to be around your children! : )

I'd focus less on trying to find people for your kids, and instead, focus on you and your kids doing something you all want to do... the people will follow.

Maybe you start volunteering time by visiting the senior center or local nursing homes. They are SO lonely there... you will be filled with love soon!

Or start donating time at the library or SPCA...

Don't worry... I know it's crappy... but at least your kids will have a realistic view of the world and it will make them strong.

I have a crap family, but I finally married into a great one.

I'd rather wait for something good and work on myself than to chase crap around... If you go onto the physical/emotional abuse forum, you'll see what your options could be... Alone starts to look REAL good.

Hugs.

There is a local mentor mom program, and I tried it but it didn't work out. I was matched with someone who actually said they had the same interests but didn't. Their ideal day was going shopping and texting once or twice a week. There was not much depth to her, it was very disappointing. I also don't want to bring random people around my children only for it to not work out and then have my children asking where that person is. It's really tough, I'm just not sure how to go about it anymore.

Good for you!!! Protect your kids from that dysfunction, and while you're at it, protect yourself too! I'm in the same boat. Most of my family is still alive, just completely messed up. You're doing the right thing, but please be careful with strangers around your children. I've discovered we have to be our own best friends and angels. Hang in there.

I know the feeling. I have five brothers and one sister, nieces and nephews, a few cousins, my mom, and dad (who lives in another state). Today, it's just the three of us who lives here at home (me, mom and my youngest brother who is five years younger than me). I have family who live in California and family in Ohio. I feel rejected so much in my life that by some family members and a few people who I thought was friends to us. I began thinking that I must be a bad person. For example there is a lady who lives nearby me, who used to call and stop by to visit us but blocked our number from calling her phone. I had a friend, who became my best friend when we attend elementary school in 1981, had stopped talking to me in 2006. So now I don't have close friends.

My oldest brother who lives in Ohio, had began talking to me negatively and giving me a lectures; the lectures were about not letting others upset me and etc. He once asked my dad what would me and my youngest brother do if anything ever happened to my mom? I took that as a hint of him saying that if something happened to mom, don't come my way. I have a brother who had been arrested by the police, and he is on a suicide watch; it's possible that his youngest kids (grandkids) were taking out of his home; we used to be very close when we were kids. I wished that he did not do what he did because he would not be in jail. :( I feel so alone!!!!!! I'm close to my mom (we are like best friends) but lately her emotions had taken the best of her; and my youngest brother, I can always go and talk with him but I don't want to overload him with my problems because he lives here at home and hear the same things.

it's hard for me to trust because of the emotional hurt and pain I received from others in the family and outside of the family. I had a therapist and she messed up my trust. She told my mom how I cried when I last seen her and then mom began to feel guilty to the point that she did not want me around. (Damn that hurt like Hell!)

To shortened the story, you can see how I relate with you. :)things that make you say "hmmmmm"