Family Issues Support Group
Family issues is a huge range that go from minor conflict to major misbehaviour and even abuse on the part of individual members of the family occur. Whether you feel you are in a dysfunctional family or you're dealing with a very specific issue, this is the place to talk about it and find others who might be going through the same thing.
I married my husband a year and a half ago. I have three kids, 18,23,and 8. He has two 18,23. His are the most special important thing and mine, pardon the language, are shit. And believe me, his kids are nowhere near perfect. He don't want my kids anywhere around. My daughter, 23 got married this past wkend and she wanted to come and stay a few days at our house(which is huge) just for a couple of days to get away. She and her husband have no car and no home yet. They are living with his family and they (his family) have 7 kids so they just needed to get away for a few days. He said that if I let them come, we will fight the whole time because he don't like it. My 17 yr old son never comes anymore because my husband don't want him there either. Don't even speak to my son when he comes over. I can't stand it anymore. He is a total asshole. I left when he said that yesterday and spent the night at my mom's. I don't think I'm going back this time. I need advise, please.
With that being said the only thing I can say is if you both can't sit down together and communicate with each other and start to make some compromises and changes that you both feel comfortable with I do not see your relationship with your husband getting any better.
As for you daughter and her new husband staying with you for a few days I don't see why that should be problem but again I do not know why your husband is against it or if he has any valid reasons. Same thing with your feelings on letting his son stay with you off and on. If he is doing things that you feel are not appropriate in the home or not acceptable have you and your husband tried communicating with each other to see what boundaries, rules and changes can be made to make things better?
The only other thing I suggest you consider doing is talking to a marriage counselor hopefully your husband will agree to this and if not you should talk to one on your own. I think if all the problems you both have can be addressed one at a time and you both can start to understand each others feelings and what is causing all this negativity especially the relationships you both have with all the kids involved, I think you both have good chance of working through them.
All the kids are part of the package when you both got married but they are not your whole life. You and your hubby should not have to choose between the kids and the relationship you have together if you both can agree to work together as a team rather then against each other and I believe a counsellor could help you do that if you are both willing to give it a shot.
Hopefully if you both can work together in dealing with all the kids and the mistakes they make rather then fight with each other things can be a whole lot healthier for everyone involved.
Anyway I hope this helps a bit and in time everything will work out for the entire family. Wishing you the very best.
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