It has been a while since i have been on here. I have had a lot of life changes in the last 8 years. I got married, had 3 miscarriages, almost lost both parents in a car accident, had 3 kids and tons of family drama.  My dad decided after 47 years of marriage to "legally separate" from my mom but not before dragging her to court and throwing mud on her. He caused a massive rift in our family.  I already had a very strained relationship with my father and this was the icing on the cake for me. He went after the one person who stood by him for everything. She helped him get his GED, his college degree, told him he could do anything he put his mind to.  She took care of him through cancer treatments and always put herself last. He lied in court, he lied to family members about things and now things are just detroyed.  There is just so much hurt there. Then to top it off he has chosen my brother's kids over mine. When i had the miscarriages his reaction was "why can't she just get over it now" instead of supporting his only daughter through one of the toughest things i have ever gone through in my life. I just don't know where to go with this. I am mad at him for how he has treated me, my mother, my kids, my husband and the biggest thing is he doesn't care. Apparently, i owe him an apology for what i have no idea. I had my third kid 3 months ago and he declared that he wanted to see his latest grandkid.... not a mention to my other two kids... just the newest one. I mean where do you go with this? So much disappointment and anger and the one person who is causing most of this doesn't care so it isn't even like i can tell him any of this. The kicker is that he just won't stay out of our lives. After everything he did he still spends time at my mom's house because they are technically married still and he owns half the house. So he keeps coming back into our lives and won't leave us alone. It feels as though the wound keeps getting ripped open every time it starts to heal.

I am just mad all the time. i don't know if he is all of it or some of it. I don't know if it is because a fmaily i once thought was close turns out not to be. I don't know if it is because no one talks to anyone anymore. My one brother sided with my dad and my middle brother sided with me and my mom. The extended family also took sides even on my mom's side. My one aunt who has always been in competition with my mom actually helped my dad get the lawyer. It is just a mess. 

How do you move on? How do you move past because obviously the person who is causing this doesn't care about the amount of damage he has caused and keeps causing? I need to move on because it is effecting me daily. I am always mad and my kids and husband don't deserve that anger pointed at them. I get frustrated and mad at the dumbest things.  Things that normally i wouldn't even care about.  I just don't know what to do. Any suggestions?