Family Issues Support Group
Family issues is a huge range that go from minor conflict to major misbehaviour and even abuse on the part of individual members of the family occur. Whether you feel you are in a dysfunctional family or you're dealing with a very specific issue, this is the place to talk about it and find others who might be going through the same thing.
I have an older daughter who is now 34 and our relationship has been very difficult. For reasons I cannot understand my daughter has little to no respect for me. She often lashes out at me and I have let it go time and again because of my Grandchildren and my desire for peace and a good relationship with them.
A few days ago I took my four year old granddaughter to a school function because my daughter just had a third baby last week. Her father was there initially but had to leave. Of course my grandhchild shed a few tears, but nothing big. I chose to just gloss over the tears and redirect her. Within a few minutes she was fine. I took her home afterwards and my daughter yelled at me saying someone called her from the school to say I did not comfort my grandchild and just stood there while she cried.
After this issue yesterday I was at my daughter's home for a large party to welcome our new Grandson into the family. We had talked about my picking up my granddaughter on Friday, but I had explained I couldn't do it after all because I had a previous commitment. My daughter became absolutely livid. She began yelling at me and screaming in front of all the guests there, all the relatives. I moved into another room to avoid her. The inlaws asked what she was yelling at me about and I explained the situation. At that point my daughter came in and said to leave her home. She literally tossed me out in front of all the friends and family.
I am now trying to decide the best course of action. My husband wants me to make peace and keep the lines of communication open. Personally I have had enough of her abusive behavior and do not wish to keep the lines open. I am certainly considering not doing anything else for her regarding the grandkids, but on the other hand I am not sure I want to sever ties with them because of their mother.
What suggestions would you have? I have tried talking to my daughter about her behavior to no avail. I can't continue to be abused like that.
A few days ago I took my four year old granddaughter to a school function because my daughter just had a third baby last week. Her father was there initially but had to leave. Of course my grandhchild shed a few tears, but nothing big. I chose to just gloss over the tears and redirect her. Within a few minutes she was fine. I took her home afterwards and my daughter yelled at me saying someone called her from the school to say I did not comfort my grandchild and just stood there while she cried.
After this issue yesterday I was at my daughter's home for a large party to welcome our new Grandson into the family. We had talked about my picking up my granddaughter on Friday, but I had explained I couldn't do it after all because I had a previous commitment. My daughter became absolutely livid. She began yelling at me and screaming in front of all the guests there, all the relatives. I moved into another room to avoid her. The inlaws asked what she was yelling at me about and I explained the situation. At that point my daughter came in and said to leave her home. She literally tossed me out in front of all the friends and family.
I am now trying to decide the best course of action. My husband wants me to make peace and keep the lines of communication open. Personally I have had enough of her abusive behavior and do not wish to keep the lines open. I am certainly considering not doing anything else for her regarding the grandkids, but on the other hand I am not sure I want to sever ties with them because of their mother.
What suggestions would you have? I have tried talking to my daughter about her behavior to no avail. I can't continue to be abused like that.
I know these aren't really solutions, but rather things to ponder.
I let go of my daughter when she hit me, i am like you tired all a lifetime of abuse from her in public in front of friends at church holidays, anytime was good for her to be verbaly abusive to me, for peace sake i did not fight back!!! ( and i am glad) .finally last mothers day she hit me for the first time. luckily there are no grand babies there.i don't talk with her anymore. (maybe some day).i think if you just don't see her as often just once in a while,and only when she is nice to you, gosh Good Luck and i am sorry. We love them so much!!.
If you stopped seeing her I guess you could mail stuff to her kids to keep some form of contact? Then when they are older they could have the option of seeing you alone (unless your daughter is malicious enough to intercept the mail!)