I lost my dad a few months ago after an intense cancer battle. He had stage 4 head and neck cancer.

Pain and duration depend a lot on individual circumstances.

Why do you ask?

did he have to stay in the hospital?
was he in alot of pain?
how long did his body keep working?
I have ewing sarcoma and nobody will tell me the truth of how its going to be. they always say don't worry about it or thats not something you need to think about or thats something you should talk to your counselor about and when I did she gave me a paper and a website that was written for like little kids and doesn't actually say anything real

Ccool,
I am sorry to hear about your diagnosis.

In my opinion, you are not asking the best question. I don't know your situation, but I know this in general: if you feel that your cancer will kill you, you will prove yourself right. If you feel that you can fight it, beat it, and live on, you might.

My dad had a 20% chance of living 5 years. He ended up living nearly 10. When his end came, he had hospice care for less than 1 day. He fought hard and died on his own terms, no prolonged hospital stay, etc. your results may vary.

Before you give up:
1) Google and read "bloch foundation letter to diagnosed cancer patients"
2) call the Livestrong foundation hotlone and ask for some Resources. Their whole goal is to give straight answers to your questions. 855.220.7777
3) write me if you want to talk more. I am deeply-committed to helping people to remove the mystery of cancer.

Above all, get support. There is an army of resources to help you. Do not give up.

I'm not giving up but its not up to me. I did a pet on monday and doctor says the treatments are not working as good as they hoped and I did a bone aspiration today to see if its spread more. I hope not. I mean its guna be good news, I know it. they keep talking about pallative care. did your dad have that?
I'm going to check out those 3 things you said. thank you for telling me about them

You're welcome.

Unless your doctor is at MD Anderson, Sloan-Kettering, or Johns Hopkins, there is always hope. If the hope is not up to you, then who is it up to?

Sometimes people get dealt a bad hand... I've seen it and I've felt it myself. That might be you and it sucks if it is. Read the bloch letter though. His doctor sent him home with weeks to live and he ended up living 30 more years! Look into second opinions l, clinical trials, and alternative medicine. These things may nothat work... but what if they do?

Whatever your path, be strong and feel hopeful. if you are going to end up on a death bed, lie there confident that you did all that you could! Your doctor cannot fight for you... only you can decide how much to give.

There are plenty of people with sad stories, but there are also plenty of people with stories of beating impossible odds. The bottom line is how much are you willing to do to be in the second group?

I hope you fight and I hope you win. I hope also that you keep me (and the forum) posted. For whatever it's worth, you have a stranger who believes in you.

R
ps- no, I don't know about pallative care, but I would take advantage of every resource available to you and push on all of them for additional resources if you need them. Your life is on the line... if someone makes a sacrifice to help you and it works for you, you will provide a story that inspires him/her for the rest of their life. If you offend someone and it doesn't work out, wtf does it matter for you :)?

All these things are only my suggestion. I can comment on your life, but only you has to live it. I hope that you make the choices that bring you the most peace in a difficult time.

I'm guna ask my brother about maybe trying a new hospital and doctor. I mean I like the ones I have now but maybe a new hospital and doctor will try something else.
theres still lot I want to do and I'm making myself a list because maybe it will help. I'm not feeling good or thinking right so I'll try reading this and writing back later.

Ccool,
I'm glad to hear that you're looking into this and making your list. Keep it up!

I asked my brother but he says his insurance only covers the hospital were at and he has no way of taking me somewhere else. he came home in the middle of the day and his eyes were all red and he said he was talking to my doctor but he wont say anything other than he has some things to think about and that we will talk later. I'm hoping we can do another clinical trial. I'm still working on my list, so far I have 23 things to do and there all ones that are easy to do and not impossible like go to Mars or something like that.

I'm glad to hear that you are making progress on your list! It is unfortunate that your insurance gets in the way of other treatment options, but definitely do some searching for clinical trials and other items related to your disease. The MD Anderson website, for example, lists all the active trials they are conducting by disease type. This info may give your doctor some new ideas.

It sounds like your brother cares a lot about you and vice-versa. This is very fortunate to hear. Keep your spirits up and do not underestimate the power of positive attitude. With cancer, it makes a BIG difference.

If you have fear or have a hard time staying positive, keep using the hotlines amd/or take them up on the offer to talk to a counselor. All those people are there to help you. Make use of them if you need.

he does care and I love him. I worry about him, how he's going to be, if he's guna be ok. the news was bad. I go monday for more scans and there guna do another tube but this one wont be for medicine. did your dad have a tube for food?

yes, he had a feeding tube after his first surgery. He lived with it for 9.5 years.

I'm sorry to hear that your news was not favorable. Keep working on your list, using your resources, and sharing your feelings.

I can understand about your worry about your brother. The only advice I can give here is to remind him that you want him to go to college and to pursue his dreams.

For whatever it helps, I am pulling for you. I know that you are in a scary and difficult situation. Be strong when you can be, but be weak when you need to be. And keep writing...

I got mine on monday. I don't remember my chest one buging me this much.
I haven't talked to my brother much, I don't know what to do. don't know what to do about anything.

ccool,
sorry to hear that the tube is bothering you. hopefully you get used to it.

don't feel defeated. talk to your brother about how you feel. write it down, if you prefer, but don't feel lost. you have people who can help you.

I'm getting used to it but it was leaking today but I guess thats normal.
I've been journaling a lot, I guess it helps
still haven't talked to my brother

Glad to hear you've been Journaling. What stops you from talking to your brother?