Hi all,

I need help dealing with my wife. I'm not sure if she is bipolar or borderline. Here's my problem. Randomly she seems to get mad at me. I ask what's wrong or how can I help and she starts yelling at me. I try to tell her I am trying to understand what's happening and she starts saying I'm yelling. Then she says just leave me alone and I ask why and she claims I never listen. I say I'm sorry I don't know what I did and she says I yelled at her. I say I asked what's wrong and she says again leave me alone. I say OK I'll leave u alone and she says you don't have to say anything or sometimes you always do this. I say do what. And she says leave me alone. I leave reluctantly and maybe 1 hour later come back to her and try to talk. I ask can we talk and she starts saying I always don't do what she asks and she just constantly blames me for not leaving her alone. I try to say I just asked what's wrong and she flips out again and I walk away again. The next day she acts like she did nothing wrong and says I didn't leave her alone. That's the pattern we are in.

Here's what happened today. She was giving my son a bath and just finished. She seemed ok with him and his bath. I was watching TV. My son finishes and runs to me and she just walks out the door. I turn on the outside light and 2 minutes later she comes in the door and asks can you turn off the light. I say huh? Why? And she yells at me just turn off the light. She acts panicky and tries to turn off the light and finally gets it. I follow her out and say what's happening? Why did you need the light off? She ignores me. I say what's going on? Are we talking and she says you didn't turn off the light when I said. If someone tells you to turn off the light you do it. I say huh? What's going on? She says you have to turn off the light if I ask. I say are you listening to me I don't understand what's going on. She says I just want to be left alone and you didn't turn off the light. You never listen to me. And she walks away. I run after her and she says leave me alone and I say what happened? I get no response and I leave her alone. Now it's my son's bedtime and he wants her to go to bed and I find her outside and tell her he wants her to go to bed. He always has had bedtime with her. She yells just do it yourself. I don't have to always do it. I say but you always wanted to. She says I want to be left alone. I leave and manage to get him upstairs in bed but he keeps asking for her. Finally she comes in and tells him a story and he goes to sleep. Later I ask what happened. And she says I was annoying her. I say I mean before with the light. She says you didn't do what I said. I say what is going on. You aren't respecting me. She says you aren't respecting me. I said leave me alone. I leave confused. And here I am still confused.

Am I in the wrong? I understand I can leave her alone. Everyone tells me why don't I leave her alone but it's always randomly and I can't talk to her for about a day after when she isn't stuck in this mode of not answering me at all. It's really frustrating losing her. I don't know what to do. Thanks for listening.