I am sorry to hear this impalablack, I understand where you are coming from. my sons are 9 and 11. they tend to get distracted easily as well. one is actually diagnosed as bipolar the other they are wondering if he is. I also happen to be bipolar and I tend to do some of the same things that you have said that your mother is doing. I now stay on my meds consistently, but there was a time that I wouldn't and that can really mess with anyone, especially with bipolar people. the distraction part and the forgetfulness happens a lot to me still. in fact just today I was trying to make lunch and got distracted by some people at my door, and instead of getting into the drawer and correct cabinet for the knife and plates, I looked in my key cabinet for them, but I could not remember why I was even in the cabinets to begin with! after staring at the cabinet for five minutes, I realized what I was needing and laughed at myself for being that forgetful! I do things like this all the time, and my mother, bless her heart, has to remind me of almost everything. I know that it wears on her, and I am thankful that she does remind me even though it does get a little nerve-racking at times. as for the not noticing that she hasn't heard from you, is it possible that she really doesn't remember if you have called that day or not? sometimes, more than I care to admit, I think one day is the same day, only to be told that it is a completely different day. as for the meds part, I pray that she will one day realize that taking the meds are what helps stabilize her even when she is feeling well. at some point there is only so much you, others, and meds can do, and the rest is up to her. hopefully she will take responsibility for it. good luck and I will pray for you.

Hi thank you for replying...maybe she doesn't realise the day. I know she has said to me before that she didn't realise what day it is.

I just saw her this afternoon. She is very out of it. I wasn't sure what to do. I asked if she was ok and she just said she was tired. But she was barley listening to me and a couple of times I thought she slurred her words a little (I've never noticed her slurring before at all)...I nearly asked if she was hearing voices...but didn't. If you mention anything to do with the 'warning' signs she shows when heading in the direction of being psychotic she gets so mean and angry and it just makes things worse. Same with mentioning her medication. Now I am 99% sure she isn't taking it yet again (we only had an episode a few months ago).

I'm not sure if I did the right thing leaving her to go lay down or whether I should have said about the medication and made sure she took it tonight. I find it so hard to know what I should do when she is on the edge of tipping over...usually (most times) when she has gone psychotic she is really angry and mean just before and she isn't like that at the moment so I was worried if I brought that stuff up it would tip her over into psychotic because I made her angry and maybe leaving her alone will mean she will come out of it.

I've been trying to think if there was a time where she seemed like this and didn't end up psychotic and just stabilised on he own but I can't remember.

I really don't know whether I've done the right thing here. I am so over this.

It'd be one thing if she took responsibly for her illness and tried to take care of herself but she won't take her medicine, or see a doctor, she won't even learn about her illness and she won't listen when you try to tell her she's showing warning signs. That's why I don't want to do this anymore. She puts me under a huge amount of stress. Hurts herself and other people and gets mad when you try to tell her these are the reasons you need to take your medication.

I just want to say I'm done. You won't take your medication and mange your illness I'm not going to be involved anymore.

BUT when she is psychotic she can be a danger and she ends up spending all her money, not paying bills, hurting herself, other people, accusing people of things that aren't true ad pretty much destroys her life and then things are even worse for her to live after she comes 'out' of it. So if I just leave her to it I'm worried things will be even worse for me after...

It's just so hard I feel like it's never going to stop this is going to be forever and I'll never be happy because she is in my life.

Sorry that was so long.

GF is Bipolar 2. Thanks to me cause I do it for myself. List and schedules for everything. White board on the fridge, calender on the fridge next to the whiteboard. Planner in her purse, planner on her desk. Labels labels labels. Place for everything, everything in its place including meds. Bigggest problem which is gradually getting fixed is financial records, major mess, with routine overdrafts. You get the picture. I was told not to tough love GF, just clear boundaries, huh, see if that pays the bills and gets you to therapy. But small doses only. Hang in there you are and will be taking care of 2, it will get to be rutine and some of the paranoia disappear.

it is a long road to go with someone that is bipolar. I want you to know that whether she ends up psychotic or not, comes through it or not, it is not because you did or did not do anything wrong. the illness is cruel and mean. it makes us say and do things to ourselves and our loved ones that we would not want to do. she is lucky to have someone that cares so much about her. this being said, if she is not going to take some responsibility for helping herself and not letting the bipolar take control, and refuses to see that there is a problem, there is not much you can do. this doesn't stop you from being sad, scared, frustrated, and a whole bunch of other emotions, but you have to decide in yourself can I live with this or not? if I cut her out of my life so that I and my family can not be as affected by it, or if I stay can I accept all that comes with it? I am bipolar like I said, I take my meds, therapy, and whatnot, I still have my days when I don't function, but they are not as bad as before, whereas my sister is bipolar she is unmedicated, not going to therapy, and tends to function at a higher level than me, is not as rapid cycling, but she has the extreme mania and depression. mom lives with me and takes care of me and the children when I get down. with my sister, she becomes mean like you were talking about. mom has to walk a fine line with both of us, but more so with my sister because she refuses to even believe that she is bipolar. so with her mom has to use a back door approach with her and it does not always work. I am so sorry that you are having this problem with your mom, and I hope that she realizes one day that it is much better when controlling the bipolar instead of it controlling you. don't get me wrong there are some days that are still so bad even fighting the good fight, but I think back to when I was letting it control me and I would take any bad day I have now over back then. prayers and hugs to you in this time of trial