What is the doctor report for - compency or general psych? I hope all works out

adhd, psych, I really don't know what this report is going to do and how it will help his case

I am guessing that neither does the lawyer, but it never hurts and since you are doing it with your lawyer it is considered privileged so if it is good it can be submitted and if it is not so good to his case then they can prepare a defense if the prosecution wants to bring something up from it. In law strategy is 70%-80% is about strategy.

REmember this, the lawyer works for you, regardless if they are a public defender, ASK Them all the questions that you have, their job is to guide you through the legal process like a tour guide takes you through a museum. But they are also human and are not perfect, so if you question something bring it up, remember you are the only one that has to live with anything that happens, they go home to their life and will be unaffected by the outcome...

Missing:
My son was arrested in June of 2005.(he was 17) We didn't even go to trial until December of 2009. Four and a half years later! I understand your frustration! What made it worse was his "victim" got pregnant (At 15) by another boy's baby......we had to wait for almost 2 years for her to have the baby and "loose the baby weight as not to sway the jury's opinion of her" (prosecutors words). Tell me how fair that is!?!
By that time, my son was 21 years old!
The justice system is not what the average American believes it is.
*Sigh*
Hang in there and live each day with your son.....enjoy your time with him :)
Blessings,
RWsMom

RWsMom, did anyone ever bring that "boy" in on charges if she was 15? Seems pretty unfair to me. If you're gonna rig one up you gotta rig them both.
It was about 3 years for my boyfriend. When he finally was told how much time he had to do all he could think was the wasted 3 years and he would have been finished already. Now we struggle everyday with his probabtion obligations and restrictions.

Wow... Sometimes your best friend is the one that isn't scared to grab you by the collar.... push you against the wall...... tell you you screwed up big time ! I am not going to avoid the elephant in the room.

You state that your son will not let you touch him and you miss him. Well.... you turned him in ! I don't know what he did exactly..... maybe you can share..... what I do know is he has some real trust issues with you now........ it could be that you were the only one in his life he could trust........ he is a very depressed man and could be thrown to suicidal tendencies having his own mom turn him in like that......... I am just sharing what I think is going through is mind and soul right now.

The first step for you is to regain his trust. For both of your sakes, for the good of your soul and his. Tell him you didn't know what you were doing and how sorry you are. Do what ever it takes to get this healing done. The foundation of his very existence has been shattered. Not by the arrest but by you turning him in. He needs his mom now more than ever......... try to get his forgiveness.

First I will tell you that in the criminal court, time is the defenses' friend. Evidence degrades, witness testimony gets fuzzy and other factors work in the favor of the accused the more time that is drawn out before trial. When it comes to sex offenses, that mantra goes out the window because of the belief that a victim will change their story for any number of reasons none of which are related to the accused not having done what they are accused of. That is why you will see numerous cases where the victim recanted but the accused still went to prison. The rule "guilty until proven innocent" does not apply to sex offenses.

Your son does have every right not to trust you, and you will need to earn that back. Think of it this way, the ONE person in this world that has always been on his side, just decided to change sides. It is devastating. My father a retired OB/GYN has always said that there is one thing that you never do, even if you believe that the mother will side with you, is get in between her and her off-spring. The mother will always side with their off-spring even if they know they are in the wrong. Which I am sure you are like in all other circumstances.

What you didn't know was that the Police are not on your side. They do not work for you, they do not care about you, they work for the state or municipality that they are paid by regardless of where that money comes from. They are not out there to "Serve and Protect" unless you are only looking at it from the stand point of they are there to Serve the interests of the politicians that dictate their budget and Protect those same people from regular citizens like you and I. But that is not what they teach anywhere in our society, they teach us that 'officer friendly' is here to help us, when in reality his job isn't really to help but to enforce ordinances and statutes, investigate infractions to those rules and then to subsequently arrest and pass on the information they have gathered to those than will prosecute you to the fullest extent of the laws that those that they protect (the politicians) passed.

We understand that you were only trying to seek help for your son. You thought that the police were there to help you, but you have found that isn't the case. "ya live, ya learn" Now you must take that new knowledge and move forward... The trust thing will be a hard one to overcome, but you will have support here, people that know exactly what you are going through because they are living it right now.

Please don't be put off by some of the more stern comments, even my own really doesn't pull any punches. But realize that had we all known then what we know now, none of us would be here... We are just trying to keep it from happening again....

Quote from the movie "Enough" Ginny - "You have a divine animal right to protect your own life and the life of your offspring" Even Slim didn't do something until Mitch threatened their little girl.... It is something I think that we all need to remember regardless of whether or not we have children... I don't have kids, but I have animals who might as well be... and I will, defend them with my life... for that is MY right, to protect those that I love.

I was getting some advise from a friend who happened to be a mandated reporter and she said I had to turn him in or she would. My son and I have a strong relationship and he does trust me. he did something to a girl under the age 12 and has admitted to it. What he did was wrong and i think the justice system is rail roading him. He got involved in a u touch me and I touch you game. i do love him and I do feel that if he got away with this , he might even go further. I visit with him 2x a week and talk to him on phone everyday

I am not so sure he does trust you anymore... for if you as a parent had done that to me and I was sitting in jail, I might talk to you, but wouldn't trust you for a very very long time... I would still love you but I wouldn't trust you...

I do understand your position though, it was someone younger than 12 and he did admit to it. Although if he gave that same confession to the cops, and then subsequently signed this 'confession' on what is usually a Miranda Waiver, expect him to be behind bars for a long time.

The justice system has nothing to do with Justice and is really only a corrupt legal system, which has nothing to do with justice. Getting away with someone, getting treatment for an undesirable behavior, and going to prison for 10 years are VERY VERY different thing. Prison is not designed to 'help' anyone but it is designed to make better and better criminals. Prison isn't designed for treating anything, even if that is what they campaign on, it is a blatant lie on their part. What it is designed to do is produce a more well-rounded criminal and a stigma that will follow him for his entire natural life.

I am so sorry that you and your son has to go through this, and I can't tell you that it is going to get any better, in fact it will get harder as time goes on until the sentencing is done and you can then prepare for what is coming once he gets out.

I know about frustration! My husband was arrested end of March, and on Nov. 4 is going before the court (if he makes it this time) for the 5th time! It goes on and on, and I cannot go forward with my life until his life is "settled". The system stinks and needs to be revamped. Too much time wasted with long lunch hours (ala Casey Anthony trial), heck, I watched a prison show where the criminal has been in JAIL for over 10 years. It showed he had a court date, then returned with another rescheduled date because of "new evidence". WTH???? C'mon, get these guys (and women) processed within a reasonable amount of time, so they can do their time and get on with their lives, and their families can go on with theirs.

There are motions that can be filed with the court to expedite things but most defense lawyers will tell you that in the majority of cases time is your friend and while it sucks to wait the longer you wait the less likely you are to be convicted (that theory doesn't work in sex cases but it does work with murder cases).

The system is broken, pretty much beyond repair. The solution to that lies in our American history and why we are Americans rather than a British Colony. Most people don't believe that we are that bad off, until they get caught in the spiderweb they call a legal system. It's sad that we are going to repeat something we should have learned with the blood of our ancestors.

My comments are not meant to hurt you in anyway. It is like tuff love. We love each other here and give hard advice sometimes. You see..... when you were faced with the choice to turn him in or they were?..... you would have been better off letting someone else do it...... as you stood by him...... unconditionally.

It is important you tell him your sorry for not handling this properly, it was wrong. Regain his trust.

You have a long road ahead of you and we will be right here for you. I don't know of any place else to turn.

Love to you
Mike

I decided to do it my self thinking, it will help my son's case, showing we came forward and not some one else turned him in. I know now I was wrong. I had know idea he would be charged as an adult. I thought just because he is only 15 he would spend a few day's in jv. The police officer who took his statement said well I can handcuff you now and take you away but I think being home with parents who love you is the place you need to be. It was almost 3 weeks later when the sheriff called my house and asked us to bring him in for a few more questions, so they rail roaded us.

I just read the back story on your son. I'm sorry for what you all are going through.

thanks for all the support I am getting, it is so difficult going through this. I really do get comfort here.