My husband is an RSO. He served over a decade for molesting a child, his female relative. He has told me very few details about her and her immediate family, and he still hasn't told me exactly what he did except that he was very high when it happened. I did not even know her first or last name, what she looks like, her age, or which race she fell under since she is multiracial. Well, I was able to learn from a friend of mine the victim's grandparents last name. Let's just say I'm very good at finding what I'm looking for online with very little information without using those paid background check sites.

So I found out her first and last name, her age, and that she is engaged. I also found out the names of her siblings, mother, and other extended relatives, and I saw pictures of just about everyone.

Let me be very clear, I HAVE NO INTENTIONS OF REACHING OUT TO HER OR ANYONE OR HER IMMEDIATE FAMILY, NOW OR EVER. Since my husband was being very secretive and revealed information too slowly, I felt like I had to find out myself. As his wife I feel it's my right to know, and although all of this happened before I came into the picture, I feel like it is unfair for him to know all about my past - the good, bad, and embarrassing - and him not tell me all about his past.

Anyhow, I was happy to see that based on her pictures and posts she seems to be getting along fine, though I could never know what's in her mind and heart. And now when my husband says anything about the incident I can at least have her picture in my mind. I can't completely explain why this was important to me, but it was.