Hello again, everyone. For those who didn't follow my first post, I am a 19 year old female, about a year ago I had begun a romantic relationship with a long time childhood friend. About two months ago, he and his brother were both charged with sexual offenses, which were a result of the cycle of abuse.
My love had been sexually abused when he was a young child, which had led him to become intimimate with his cousin. Now here's the f***ed part, for those who had been following my posts.
He came out to me and told me the truth. Originally, he had told me it had been one occurrence. A couple weeks ago, I went to his first court date where I had seen the amount of charges he had, he had 13 charges against him. Now that didn't make sense? So finally, he came out clean, and told me the truth.
Between the ages of 10 and 12, he had about 6 or so sexually encounters with his younger cousin, who I think was 6 at the time.
Upon discovering all of this, I had also discovered that in my personal childhood, i was sexually assaulted by my dad's exgirlfriends sons.
Now this is the hard part. Because of these self discoveries of mine, I have unwillingly put up a mental wall between my boyfriend and I, this mental wall is, in ways, my defense mechanism.. I do not know how to break the wall down.. I don't know how to let him in to my heart or mind, I have been pushing him away so hard and I don't know if its because he and his brother, in ways remind me of the brothers who assaulted me.. I don't know what to do. Can i even handle this?
Maybe couples counseling?
Also what should I expect from these charges?
Just a scared little girl..
-YourSafeHaven