BTW, he is on medication for bipolar with made a world of difference with his attitude regarding illogical rage, yet these problems persist. And the reason why I say he is not looking for work like he should is because he will go months without looking. He has told me that. Last time i checked, a person who wants to work spends at least the same amount of time looking as a full time job-40 hours a week. It's like he has no dignity or pride. Real men don't live off of their women without first doing everything they can not to.

It sounds like you need to put your foot down.

When I first got together with my husband, I will admit he went through something similar to this.

It finally took me throwing him out of the house to get it through his head to cut it out. He screwed up again and I put his playstation in the closet. I know it sounds ridiculous, but hit him where it hurts.

He was employed through out all of this. When we first got together he wasn't making a lot of money and he was horrible with spending. After we moved into our own place, he had a better job and was even worse with money.

I took his debit card away and if he wanted money he had to ask for it. Was I treating him like a child? Yes, because he was acting like one. It only took him 3 months to get out of that habit, and about 1 more to where now he is very responsible.

One of the problems was I was enabling him to act like that. I fully admit I felt bad for him. But he was going to destroy us financially to the point we couldn't recover and he would have ended up in jail.

We are still catching up on some bills he screwed up on. It's going to take a while to get those paid off, but he realized I would leave or kick him out if he did it again. I guess I'm more valuable than whatever he was doing.

It hurts, and it sucks. But if he is going to do this kind of stuff you have to start thinking about you.

Being bipolar isn't an excuse. I am bipolar. You have to grow up sometime.

I am Bipolar and am an SO. And yes there is times I over do my spending but only when I can back it up I always make sure to maintain a $1000 cushion and if I get down to that point I make sure I only buy out of need instead of wants. And when I get down to that $1000 cushion I start putting back $100 a week from the $200 a week I earn at my job. And if i can Ill put back $150 in a week. Holding myself responsible for the $100 at least until I get at least $2500 saved before I go back to spending again. This way I can buy nice stuff from time to time. I am pending my VA disability and I currently get SS Disability so I keep my bills affordable with my SS Disability so the little job is extra money to be able to do these things with. I do this so I can go on nice vacations once a year plus have my spending sprees. I only wish I had a partner in my life and before coming to this forum I felt that was pretty much impossible by me being an SO but seeing Ladies on here that are dating or even married to SO's and they are there for them that is yet another way this Forum has helped me. So I agree being Bipolar is definitely an issue for some people but it isnt an excuse because being bipolar can be controlled in that aspect if the person with it realizes they have this problem and are willing to work on it. So just maybe he needs to realize he has a problem and possibly have you to help him bring control over it. He does need to realize as well he has a jewel in even having himself a helpmate because if you are gone there really isnt many that will accept his disability and then to know he is an SO gives him another disability in being able to find love. I hope I one day find that in a lady but am starting to think this old man will get old and be alone. In fact it may be hard to get used to having someone as well.

I do hope things work out for you especially if he figures out that you are a jewel to him and he is a very lucky man