It's good to start early. I started when my son was sentenced.
Are you really required to tell your landlord? Because that's not always something you have to do.

Welcome to the every expanding group.

As far as my boyfriend told me, that's among the requirements - my landlord must be informed since he will have to register at that address. We live in NJ, so the registration laws and SO restrictions are severe and borderline debilitating.

Right after I took my plea I went over to the mobile home park manager to inform him. His wife said that registrants were not allowed in the park and wanted me to send her a letter stating that if anyone complained that I would immediately move out. Her husband said that no way was I going to send her a letter, (They already knew I was about to retire and move anyway after living there for 27 years.)

My son didn't have to tell the landlord.. and a lot of people don't. I would double check on that. do an online search.
I know NJ is tough. I thought about moving there before my son's release and it was not on my 'good' list.
Sometimes people are told things that aren't correct. Just do some research, or call NJ police to see what they say. I had to do a lot of research on my end.
My son had to register at his home but we didn't have to tell the landlord. I'm in PA so you might be right, but if I were you I'd do some more homework on that one.

I would first take a look online to see if there are any registrants living in your complex, if there are, you already know the answer. If not, do some research on where registrants live and compile a list of possible places you can check on if they say no to your boyfriend residing there.

I used to live in NJ and I'm looking to move back there. As far as I have found out, unless you are on parole you don't HAVE to inform your landlord. As far as apartment complexes go, I do know that 95% of them ask if you have been convicted of a crime on your application and they ask what the crime was...then they toss your application in the garbage. If you are already there you have to fill out a background check for anyone moving in with you and they will most likely not allow it. If you are renting a house from a private person it is different. If you talk to them they may be ok with it. Good luck with finding a place to live.

Ever think about moving?

He currently works a 7-day job and participates in various therapy groups that will speed up his release - his maximum release date was January 2017, so he would be on parole from his release until that point. Being on parole, he's told me that my landlord does have to know that he's a sex offender, and that when they come to inspect my house that's the first thing they check - some inspectors even speak to the landlords directly. However, given what some of you have said, I will definitely do some research and find out. This eases my mind quite a bit.

I have no problem with moving, but if he's on parole, I don't think he's allowed to leave the state. Also, I've been trying to do research (but have come up short) in checking what states are the least debilitating to live in. Any suggestions on that front?

Also, the inspector arrives 6 months before his release - and we're not informed if we passed or failed until the first of the month he's due to be released. By that time, he'll be stuck in a motel, and we won't be able to find a new place and 're-inspect' it due to time constraints.

My advise would be for you to talk to your landlord early. Like now... The reason I say this is because it will give you that much more time to plan, it isn't like they will throw you out the second you ask, first of all they can't, second it just wouldn't be good business to throw out a paying customer because of question.

Talking about it.... I don't know how you go about explaining his charges, but I used to say when my husband was in prison was something more like a story of the events. Leaving out as much as possible the terms sex offense and sex offender. Both of which bring on an automated/conditioned response of repulsion.

If you are renting from a corporation or some kind of entity that is a management company, they will follow policy and use it as a shield. If you are renting from some private party, then you will find them to be more reasonable just due to the fact that they will make a decision or exception based on your situation and reputation rather than a book of policies.

As for states that may be less debilitating, if you are looking to stay on either coast, you might just be better off staying put. If you are willing to move, Minnesota, Pennsylvania and a few others are OK, none are 'great' by any stretch of the imagination.

When someone is on paper (supervision, parole, etc) they are essentially 'owned' by the corrections department that is incharge of him. They have to know everything, talk to his bosses, know who the landlord is, make sure that the person they are supervising is being open and up front about their crime and not trying to 'hide' from their past. To me this is far more about shaming than it is rehabilitation, but that could be their methods that create that rather than the therapeutic benefits that can come with acknowledging what happened. But I digress... They have a massive control on his life.

What I can tell you about supervision from the experiences I have had here in WI (don't come here, bad state to move to) they aren't all that bad. Granted we live in the country in a home I have owned for a very long time. So he had a stable out of the way place to come to live when he was able to come home. He started out having to travel to the PO office once a week which was 40 miles away, but after about a year he was down to once a month face to face visits that included his home visits so now he only has to go to the office every other month. Things do get 'easier' in some respects. So while things are rough now, I can assure you that as time goes on, you will get used to some things and other things will just get easier cause that is what they are getting easier. It just doesn't happen right away and could be a year or more depending on the PO/Agent he gets (they play an enormous factor in how life after prison goes for someone getting out and there are plenty of terrible ones out there) For him, the best advise is to 'play the game' and "learn the rules" the sooner that happens for him the sooner his life and your's will level out.