Welcome. This is a tough road to endure, but over time, it does get easier. I look forward to every letter, every call and every visit with hubby. You are fortunate to have a relative short Sentense if he will only have to serve 9 months. That time will fly by before you know it.

Don't stress about the registry, and obsticals he may or may not ensure. Stressing about the what ifs isn't effective, just address them as they arise.

You will survive this, and will make you all stronger. We are all here for you when you need us....

Thought of as week...this is the question that keeps coming to mind..she said it took two years for them to press charges. I think with a lot of people, it is such a petrifying thought, they just put it in the back of their mind and hope that day, where a grand jury has issued a warrant for their arrest, won't ever come. Two years this guy, and many others, my brother included, had time to LEGALLY pack up everything and start fresh somewhere else..why don't people do this? Unless they have been formally charged, they are legally allowed to move about freely, correct?????

Well it only took two months for them to officially arrest my son and we were just in limbo for those months. Had no idea what to do, who to talk to. We are not a prison family, never was anyone ever arrested for anything in our whole family so had idea what to expect. Once arrested our "high" profile attorneys did not direct us either. Sure they sat with him giving legal advice but never walked us through the process of first the county prison where I had no idea even how to give him money, nor how to visit him. I didn't know anything until a guard let him call me. I think every lawyer should have some kind of "prison" process handbook! The unknown is the scariest part.
Your husband has a pretty short sentence (I know you aren't thinking that right now), my son received 25 years, a quarter of his life will be spent in prison. My son had no children and for that right now I am grateful. The road is harder with children. But stay strong, keep your chin up. Come often ask all the questions you have. You will get support here from other family members going through the same thing.

25 years with a high profile attorney?!?! Damn thats as much as some murderers get! Curious as to what the charges were...

Alik,
We are very glad you found us and YES you will find support here. I agree: even though it doesn't seem like it right now, 9 months - 3 years is a short time and will go by quickly. My boyfriend has nine years and has already been there for six months. It was terrible in the beginning - missing him, having to take care of everything here, trying to figure out how to write, visit, add money to his account. I still miss him every day but we've settled into a routine of letters, phone calls, visits so we still feel connected.

I was also very frightened about the registry but coming here and joining a local support group has helped me to learn more about it and not be as scared. As Rew says: it's doable and you just have to take it one day at a time. (I'm sure you'll hear from him soon!)

Again, welcome! Glad you are here.
Iris

Thank you everyone. The prosecutor wasn't happy with the judge giving him 3 years. My husbands original plea deal was for 5 years but since my husband is 49, hasn't has so much as a parking ticket and held a job down for 27 years he thought 5 years was too much. I am so grateful that he only has to serve about 9 months before he's up for parole. @amynmesa, my husband was arrested and brought back home (no bail had to be paid, and they had him all processed and back home in about an hour) and they didn't even look at his computer till 18 months later. At that point they offered him a plea deal for 3 years but we decided that we should take a shot at filing a motion to dismiss due to his right to a speedy trial. He got his day in court 6 months later and the judge seemed to think his rights were violated but he didn't want to be "that judge that let a sex offender walk". So my husband took the second plea deal he was offered, which was 5 years, and you know the rest. We couldn't just pack up and go somewhere because the ball was rolling when he was arrested. If I didn't have kids I probably would have lived on the run for the rest of our lives, but I couldn't do that with kids. Now we have to take make the decision to spend more money to try an appeal because we have too much money for a public defender, but not really enough to live on.

I feel terrible because I wasn't expecting him to call me the first day and I missed a call from him yesterday. I've woke up this morning and I'm sitting on edge waiting for my phone to ring. I set up the phone payment thing since my phone doesn't accept collect calls (stupid verizon) and I'm hoping he calls soon. I miss him so much and I'm so scared for him being there.

I appreciate everyones support and I hope I can be a help to some people here as well.

Alison

Alik, no cell phone provider will allow collect calls. It's a way to protect you from unauthorized charges, so that's why you have to set up a phone account...

As far as missing calls, set your phone up next to you at night, with the ringer on. You will be able to hear the phone ring when he calls, and always keep your phone with you, so you don't miss any more.

I've gotten into a routine, and since I've started this routine, I have never missed a call since.

@ Debbie, sorry about your son. Is is appealing to get his Sentense modified? Hubby received 30 yrs (which is stupid), so we are fighting it.

alik76, I am sorry that you need this group, but I'm glad you found us. Welcome. You will find support and understanding. As for collect calls, the least expensive way to do the phone calls is to set up a phone account. Thoghtasweak is right, the time will pass by before you know it.

debbie0403, It took about 5 months from the raid to my son being arrested. I was just as lost as you were in the beginning (still am sometimes). My son got 10 years for 1 count of CP. I hope your son is fighting his sentence.