Families of SOs Community Group
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Hello everyone. My name is Chris. I'm a long time "lurker" on these boards. I don't have a family member who is a registered sex offender, nor am I an RSO myself. I am however a compassionate and concerned citizen. I do what I can with my limited means to change hearts and minds about how we treat sex offenders in this country. I am adamantly opposed to the registry and I am heartbroken at the stigma and destroyed lives that follow people forever when it comes to these types of crimes. It's mind boggling how many people who aren't affected by sex offender laws have no idea how taxing and horrible it can be for a loved one of someone who has committed a sex offense in America. The stories and posts from the many mothers and wives and friends and sons and daughters I see in here have moved me tremendously.
I am an actor/playwright and I live in NYC. I wish I were a lawyer or someone who could devote his energy into fighting these laws on the ground and in the courts. However I have chosen a different path in life. I feel it is my job as an artist not only to entertain and provide escapism for people, but to also inform and change the world by moving people and reaching their hearts. I am starting work on a new play and it's about Sex offenders, their families, and just how insane life after a sex offender conviction can be. I'm no legal scholar but if I can reach one person in the audience through a theatrical piece, I will have helped the cause.
Why am I telling you all this? It would help me greatly in constructing the play to be able to talk to some of you (privately off the forums) and conduct informal "interviews" (basically casual comfortable conversations between you and I) so that I, as an outsider on this issue, can get a true sense of what this situation is like and how it has impacted your life. I want to hear your story. I want to know how you cope. I want to feel what your feeling so I can work these nuances into a comprehensive and poignant piece of theatre with rich, believable characters. I'm not asking for information that personally identifies you, or anything specific. You wouldn't have to tell me anything other than what you wanted to share. You could give me as much or as little as you wanted to. Anything would help. The interviews or conversations could be conducted via private message on this site, or via email or some kind of messenger service if you feel comfortable. Even if you're not interested in sharing your story with me but want to be kept posted about the play and how it's coming along as it's written I'd be happy to speak to you and set that up.
My hearts and prayers are with you all as you continue in your struggles. I want to help the best way I can and use my talents to shed light on an issue that many people who aren't dealing with it don't even want to think about. To many in the world, your loved ones are faceless monsters. I know from reading these forums that you all know better. Human beings in all their complexity shouldn't have their entire lives boiled down to one bad decision they've made for the rest of their time on this earth and the amount of people connected to the offenders who suffer ridiculous hardship as a result of our draconian sex offender laws is simply a heartbreaking.
Feel free to reach out with any questions. I'd be happy to even just have a conversation with you to help you get to know me before you start sharing such personal stories with me. I want you to be comfortable. If you're up for it, please reach out and help me shed some light and dramatize this issue. This issue will ultimately be fought in courtrooms by politicians and lawyers, but changing the average person on the street's perceptions of this issue is a tough battle that needs fighting too. Let me know if you can help.
With love, respect and dignity,
-Chris
I am an actor/playwright and I live in NYC. I wish I were a lawyer or someone who could devote his energy into fighting these laws on the ground and in the courts. However I have chosen a different path in life. I feel it is my job as an artist not only to entertain and provide escapism for people, but to also inform and change the world by moving people and reaching their hearts. I am starting work on a new play and it's about Sex offenders, their families, and just how insane life after a sex offender conviction can be. I'm no legal scholar but if I can reach one person in the audience through a theatrical piece, I will have helped the cause.
Why am I telling you all this? It would help me greatly in constructing the play to be able to talk to some of you (privately off the forums) and conduct informal "interviews" (basically casual comfortable conversations between you and I) so that I, as an outsider on this issue, can get a true sense of what this situation is like and how it has impacted your life. I want to hear your story. I want to know how you cope. I want to feel what your feeling so I can work these nuances into a comprehensive and poignant piece of theatre with rich, believable characters. I'm not asking for information that personally identifies you, or anything specific. You wouldn't have to tell me anything other than what you wanted to share. You could give me as much or as little as you wanted to. Anything would help. The interviews or conversations could be conducted via private message on this site, or via email or some kind of messenger service if you feel comfortable. Even if you're not interested in sharing your story with me but want to be kept posted about the play and how it's coming along as it's written I'd be happy to speak to you and set that up.
My hearts and prayers are with you all as you continue in your struggles. I want to help the best way I can and use my talents to shed light on an issue that many people who aren't dealing with it don't even want to think about. To many in the world, your loved ones are faceless monsters. I know from reading these forums that you all know better. Human beings in all their complexity shouldn't have their entire lives boiled down to one bad decision they've made for the rest of their time on this earth and the amount of people connected to the offenders who suffer ridiculous hardship as a result of our draconian sex offender laws is simply a heartbreaking.
Feel free to reach out with any questions. I'd be happy to even just have a conversation with you to help you get to know me before you start sharing such personal stories with me. I want you to be comfortable. If you're up for it, please reach out and help me shed some light and dramatize this issue. This issue will ultimately be fought in courtrooms by politicians and lawyers, but changing the average person on the street's perceptions of this issue is a tough battle that needs fighting too. Let me know if you can help.
With love, respect and dignity,
-Chris
I've shared a lot of my story on this board, if interested you ca read my posts and message me with any questions.
My parents are defense attorneys and all my life I was witness to many many good people who were destroyed by our sex offender system and that held a profound affect on me as well.
Where I really started getting "cooking" on this issue was a year or two ago. While I dont have anyone in my life who is an RSO, I do have some who have suffered from various forms of addiction. I wanted to write a play on addiction in general so I started attending various 12 step meetings. Alcoholics anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, and Sex Addicts Anonymous. The sex addict meetings really opened my eyes in a way that I wasn't expecting. Not that all RSO's are sex addicts of course (in fact one of the worst injustices of our laws in my opinion happens when innocent people take a plea to avoid YEARS of jail and end up a RSO. Disgusting.), but thats where I started seeing the toll these laws took on some of these people and their loved ones. That drove me to do some internet research and I ended up here. Just reading and thinking, reading and thinking.
So now my "Addiction" play that I was writing turned into this play that I'm working on now. There are many "Addiction" pieces out there but I have yet to find anything good out there on this. It's a story that needs telling.
LeanOrr, I feel you when you say you are nobodies. No one listens to me either, had me and my husband been doctors or other professions similar I'm pretty sure we wouldn't be where we are now.
Thanks to everyone who has reached out to me here in the forum and also via private message. Your support is appreciated. I want to make a difference on this and I'm encouraged by the positive response I've gotten. My prayers are with you all. If anyone is willing to talk I'm still looking for more people so feel free to shoot me a message.
I will keep you all posted here as it's being written over the next few weeks and months If you have any questions or concerns. Those of you who helped me by giving interviews are welcome to read a draft of the script once it's done. Your feedback matters to me. I want to show people there's more than one side to this complex issue and I couldn't have started this play without the help of those who reached out. So thank you.
Wishing you all inner peace and love as we approach the holidays. Big warm e-hugs.
-Chris
Typically, when one speaks of such people they are the husbands, fathers, and boyfriends -- people who do not have the added issues and stigmas of mental illness. Moreover, there is no story told of those civilly committed for live on the pretext that they will receive treatment only to be denied such once civilly committed.
For these people, they are perpetually held in an invisible state even among sex offenders themselves and their families and friends. They are the "crazy people" no one cares about and the ones, in my view, who suffer the most from such laws and indifference forced upon them.