Families of SOs Community Group
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5 years ago I met the man of my dreams. I have three children from a previous and we have 1 together.
From the day we met he was my prince charming. This past 5 months has been difficult because we have been living apart due to job relocation.
My husband a quiet reserved man. He is/was a successful engineer, the top of his field.
We had what appeared to be picture perfect people would say.
I have never seen him look cross at a child. I definitely don't think he is interested in children.
A couple of weeks ago he was on an adult website looking to talk to adult. He says he honestly never believed that the person was 15. The bait and switch. He was sent a picture. Said the picture looked old, asked for another, and another and another. Finally asked that they take a current picture with a piece of paper and a saying. He said it definitely wasn't a 15 year old. A little heavier on top and crows feet around the eyes.
He says was never interested in sex really just the curiosity.
I am so torn up inside, In a week I have cleaned out out savings. 50 thousand for bond and he can't stay here. The bond reflected how much he made. 25000 for the best lawyer he could get in that area.
I have my local police department up my butt.. My kids have interviews tomorrow with social services. I know he has never touched them. I also know it's protocol and for their safety. Hell, even when it was bed time he would make sure I came along.
I don't know what to feel. I still love him. I wish I could turn off that love. I have so many questions and few answers.
We have a 1 year old baby together. I am so fearful of our future.
From the day we met he was my prince charming. This past 5 months has been difficult because we have been living apart due to job relocation.
My husband a quiet reserved man. He is/was a successful engineer, the top of his field.
We had what appeared to be picture perfect people would say.
I have never seen him look cross at a child. I definitely don't think he is interested in children.
A couple of weeks ago he was on an adult website looking to talk to adult. He says he honestly never believed that the person was 15. The bait and switch. He was sent a picture. Said the picture looked old, asked for another, and another and another. Finally asked that they take a current picture with a piece of paper and a saying. He said it definitely wasn't a 15 year old. A little heavier on top and crows feet around the eyes.
He says was never interested in sex really just the curiosity.
I am so torn up inside, In a week I have cleaned out out savings. 50 thousand for bond and he can't stay here. The bond reflected how much he made. 25000 for the best lawyer he could get in that area.
I have my local police department up my butt.. My kids have interviews tomorrow with social services. I know he has never touched them. I also know it's protocol and for their safety. Hell, even when it was bed time he would make sure I came along.
I don't know what to feel. I still love him. I wish I could turn off that love. I have so many questions and few answers.
We have a 1 year old baby together. I am so fearful of our future.
remember be careful who you talk to especially the police and DA, etc as they will act as they are your friend when all they really want is information out of you to use against him.
This is a very hard time, in the beginning there are so many questions and no answers. It will get easier as time goes on and i know it is hard to believe that now. I was just able to finally talk to my husband about some of what happened only a couple months ago. It helped some, of course there are still questions as you can only ask so many questions during a visit as you don't want to waste the whole time on that.
My husband was arrest almost 3 years ago. It is not easy for me as it was against my children and i still love him.
you will find out your true friends and family are during this time. If they do not support you in how you are feeling then separate from them if possible for awhile to see how things go as the last thing you need right now is judgemental people.
Take care of yourself as your children will need you through this too. Do not be afraid to still love your husband and support him.
Prayers
my husband has essential tremor in his hands. He can't take a simple picture for nothing. It's not like their are hidden rooms in out home. Before the relocation we were attached to the hip. We talked constantly.
They might even tell him if he doesn't confess to "more" you will lose the kids. Silence is probably the best way to protect your custody of your children. Sounds like he already made sure your kids were protected from what ever was motivating him when he went on the internet since you say ("even when it was bed time he would make sure I came along"
Don't despair. Either of you.
as tsmom2012 says this is a very hard time. Both of you are in shock but I promise you things will get better. Keep coming back. We do care.. And whatever happens we don't judge.
And they did the piled on charges. At the preliminary hearing they wanted to plea down right away. His attorney even told that it was strange how far they went down without any negotiations.
I don't think the prosecution was happy that not only did he get bailed out that we have retained him a well known high powered attorney. They wanted no internet while on bail but due to his line of work it was denied and he was allowed internet for work.