Families of Prisoners Support Group
This community is dedicated to families that have been disrupted by prison. Having a loved one incarcerated or having been incarcerated comes with its own unique challenges that require support and understanding. Join the group to find others who know what you're going through, and to seek advice or share your experience.
We have court next week. On Thursday. My guy's father text me to pick him up so we can go to the court together. I have never met his father, only through texts have we spoken. I feel nervous. This week we are supposed to see about there being a deal made for my guy. The "victim" whom is a liar is supposed to have responded to the court. She sent him a letter disguised as if it were from his son to him. I don't really know what the letter says as I was too upset to ask. He seems to be hopeful and so am I. His father will be there. I will be there. His lawyers will be there. I don't know if I should cry and just lose the battle or stand up and fight for him as I always have. He's told me that he still has feelings for his kid's mother but that his feelings for me are stronger. I don't yet know if I can deal with that. He means so much to me. I would be devastated if he were released and things went bad between us. He says he loves and misses me. He says he wants to live together again and be like we always have been...so why do I feel so afraid that I am just on the side till he gets home? Why do I feel like this next court date will be the make it or break it decision? based on what his kid's mother (the victim) says... we'll see how things turn out for him... I love this man so much and it would kill me to lose him. He's my best friend/my lover and everything else that matters. I guess I just needed to get my thoughts out.. wish us luck.. any advise on the other stuff I've said,, I'm all ears... Perhaps the uncertainty of this is what has me feeling so mixed up and unsecure... let me know your thoughts.. thanks.
Is it possible you can go meet his father before the court date? If he turns out to be weird you can make an excuse why you can't give him a ride on the court day. That could alleviate some of your anxiety.
It seems like the victims letter should be disclosed to your boyfriends attorney prior to court. Would your guy be willing to okay his attorney letting you read it before the court date?
I think you are exactly right the uncertainty of the outcome in court is wrecking havoc on your emotions. Anyone in your circumstance would be on pins and needles. Have faith and take care of you during this difficult time.
Now is not the time to drive yourself crazy with "what if" questions. Don't do it! Find something to hold onto and hold on. After you have a better idea what he's facing, then you can start to figure out what's going on with his ex. It's totally normal for him to have residual feelings, and hopefully that's all they are. He's in a bad place and it sounds like she has some issues that are adding to his troubles and confusion. That sucks! I'd say keep your chin up and stay calm. Do not fall apart! That's the last thing either one of you needs right now. Take this one day at a time...go to court, stay calm and focused, find out what's next, then deal with whatever that is. You can get through this and be all right.