Families of Prisoners Support Group

This community is dedicated to families that have been disrupted by prison. Having a loved one incarcerated or having been incarcerated comes with its own unique challenges that require support and understanding. Join the group to find others who know what you're going through, and to seek advice or share your experience.

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waiting by the phone

stndstrg22114
stndstrg22114

ok once again in waiting by my phone we set up a time yesterday for him to call so I wouldn't be in the middle of anything as he puts it.... The time has come and gone I'm worried angry my mind is going thru all kinds of things us he playing games with me is it intentional when I no in reality there is a good explanation but I dont in If I can do thins for 10 yrs the not knowing the waiting I already suffer with bi polar and severe anxiety and depression ..what do i do to ease my mind I mean the worst he can do is right another female or use the money i give him to buy a calling card yea that's my mind way it of control I put money on my phone so its num specific well it just happens yesterday he told me his friend who a girl since 3grd not to make her mad she keeps's him up on gossip and I'd getting ready to send him pictures how does he no i dont have a trust issue with him until now and she has caused us problems before how do I no he not learning on her and not me cause to me letter wtitibg is much more personal than a phone call  omg what have I gotten into all this doubt over one missed call how do I stop it....

Suchaslife
Suchaslife
Hugs hugs and more hugs.
i would ask him about this girl and tell him how it makes you feel i would also trun along the lines of how would he feel if you did that to him.....do this in a letter not over the phone.
as for the phone call well that could be down to the phones being down, them on lock down, or the phone is way to bussie for him to get on they only have a limited amount of time to get to the phones.......what your thinking is well normal i used to go into full on panic attack when my love couldn't call and normally the phones where down and he couldn't get to another phone or the phones where crazy yes there are phone hogs in there who will tie them up so its harder for everyone else.
Deep slow breaths.
stndstrg22114
stndstrg22114
ty I did write down what I felt about her and how angry and hurt I'm its not a really happy letter at all I called and they not on lock down and he not in any kinda trouble so im sure there axpkanation am I wrong to really not want hi.m writing her u mean I realize he needs all support. can get she lives in his home town and no everything going on there I live 100 miles from there and I'm nit from there how do I deal with the insecurities I have never been this way before we have always had a very trusting relariinship. its gonna be another sleepless night
Suchaslife
Suchaslife
Then phones would of been busy....it sucks but it happens.
I know i wouldn't not of been happy with my man writing to someone else who isnt family iam glad that you told him it is something you guys have to talk about.
stndstrg22114
stndstrg22114
so then you don't think in acting like a jealous freak its different when he home and talks on phone to her but the letter thing bothers me...in just really insecure right now I guess
Suchaslife
Suchaslife
Nop not at all! Hell i would be acting the same way.
stndstrg22114
stndstrg22114
ok I told him in my lettervhow angry it made me and how insecure but I would learn to deal with it but I really don't think I should have to this friend called me and told me I had to share my 15 min visit with her I drive an 1hr for that visit I'm not aharinf with anyone she can't see him once he moved she a felon but she can in Co I mean really. anyway today hasn't been bad I still not watching TV night time is worse for me I just stay awake till I can't hold open. my eyes then I go to bed our bed our room with his things right where he left them all the memories but I love him all of my heart and soul I can do this
Suchaslife
Suchaslife
Uuugggg she wanted you to share your visit??? Nop no way he should expect you to do that.
i used to ware one of my mans tops and boxers to bed it kinda made me feel like he was still there and close to me.
yes you can do this!
Lioness45
Lioness45
Share a visit? What would make him think you would go for something like that? The visit should be just for you!
stndstrg22114
stndstrg22114
lioness45. no she called and told me I have to share a visit with her she can't go to the prison cause she a felon to bad cause they moved him yesterday so I don't have to worry bout visits just letters no I have no idea where he is or when to expect to hear anything it happen so fast....
Suchaslife
Suchaslife
Keep checking if his listed at any of the prisons...thats at least something you can do. Yes they can movd them fast and never expect to get told its a part of there security stuff.....and depending on where there going moving them can take a bit and then you back at the start....waiting to get approved for phone calls, visits working out the new place. Deep breath it is doable!