Families of Prisoners Support Group

This community is dedicated to families that have been disrupted by prison. Having a loved one incarcerated or having been incarcerated comes with its own unique challenges that require support and understanding. Join the group to find others who know what you're going through, and to seek advice or share your experience.

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South Carolina inmate Legal questions/ Suggestions

Kris6578
Kris6578

I am the girlfriend of an inmate in Lieber Corrections in SC. He is serving now a 60 year sentence for murder.. Accessory after the fact charge and assualt with dangerous weapon. He is on year 15 of this term. We have been working on appeals due to lack of rep from court attorney and not all evidence being submitted. I wont go into all the details here as of yet. Just say he admits to being there and admits to his part in the situation however he was threaten to be killed also. So not so brightly he went along with everything. Landing him in jail and away from us. He was in lock up and missed a filling date for an appeal he was working on himself. I am not trying to help with this as much as I can but I an not a lawyer nor do I have the funds for a lawyer at this second. Are there any true Pro bono help available? How can I get transcripts of the court case to look at everything myself? We all make mistakes but he has served 15 yrs its time for him to come home. His codefendant stated that he wrote the court admiting that he lied but this cant be proven as of yet. However the inmate is not in the same facility as mine would it be a possiblity that he be called apon to make a statement to the prison and it be legal?

Kris6578
Kris6578
The co-defendant IS in the same Facility NOW. Typo.....
arfie
arfie
Hello Kris. Welcome to DS. Color me clueless on the legal biz, but I wanted to welcome you aboard and offer support for the emotional end of all that. How are you holding up?

Welcome aboard.
Kris6578
Kris6578
I both love and hate the weekends. I know I am going to get to spend 4 hrs with him yet hate it because its only 4 hrs and can not sit beside him, hold hands on the table, only one hug before and end of visit. He calls I try to be perky and laugh for him. Mail I try to send pic of me and kids happy but im sad because he is not in the pictures. I am just ready for the nightmare to be over and him come home.
arfie
arfie
How long were you together before he went to prison?
Kris6578
Kris6578
We were friends before hand through mutual friends. Then we were slowly in the process of building things together when poor life choices and hanging with strangers landed him were he is. He was in for a while with me only as a pen pal I kept my distance because of the stigma of he is in Jail. But I love his kids, his mom etc so I kept in touch and things just blossomed from there. I know to a point that I am still a basic pen pal due to lack of dates or what ever by standards. If at any time he said we needed to just stop making future plans me just keep casual with the kids I would. I knew I loved him when I met him but we were not at the point of life to go full force. So here I am not in love with someone that wears the inmate suit but I see HIM not the mistakes. So by his side I stay.
Kris6578
Kris6578
NOW in love typo did not mean NOT in love lol
arfie
arfie
LOL!! We could get downright Freudian on that typo. . .

Good thing I'm not a big Freud fan, huh?

Loving kids, mom, etc., is a bond quite beyond *simple* jailhouse penpal. How are they holding up? Do you see them often? Do you ever have to share your four visiting hours with them?
Kris6578
Kris6578
I have no problem sharing visiting hrs with the family. I drive his mother. If I want alone time I will go with her say on Saturday and go alone on Sunday. Kids are hard to say. one is turning 18 this year and loves his dad his youngest was only 1 when he was sent away and he only knows dad via phone calls. His ex wont take them to visit. He is getting to see his oldest for the first time this year.
arfie
arfie
I'm in awe, Kris. Way to do family.

I still haven't been able to get myself to go inside a prison. I was so threatened with it growing up that I am downright phobic. Once I got as far as the parking lot for a pre-arranged visit with a nephew and couldn't get myself to open the car door. I still feel guilty over the broken promise.
Kris6578
Kris6578
Its not easy. I look at other inmates wondering "what did he do" but have to stop myself because in there each is someones loved one. So I watch them hug, laugh, cry with kids seeing dads, husbands, sons etc. Focusing on the positive and seeing my Jonathans smile when he walks in the door is worth it. Take your time with it. Its not easy by any means.
arfie
arfie
Quite a few of my therapy supporters have encouraged me to try some prison volunteer work by way of exposure therapy. Working with at risk families and homeless people is the closest I have gotten.

It is, indeed, a tough cycle. I ran away from my own place in that family legacy and I still managed to pass the legacy on to my own sons. I couldn't even get myself to visit my own son when he did a 4 month stint in a county jail for assault.
Kris6578
Kris6578
Don't beat yourself up its not your fault what has a scary affect on you. I sit here and yeah I can visit now fine. But I have left the legal paperwork up to Jon and now he has lost a deadline. So I sit here feeling guilty of not helping more then I should have. I could of saved $ for attorney as the years went by 15000$ I hear. But I haven't and so he could of been home before now if not for me.... but he does not hold this against me. Yet I do every time I see him and he says he loves me and cant wait to come home.
gregsbaby
gregsbaby
Hi Kris,

Rewdiazepam (rew) is our go to guy of all things legal so send him a pm (or wait til he pops on here, pm is probably faster) and he'll help you as much as he can :)

So sorry you're going through this. I thought my HTB and I had a long sentence as we're on year 6 of a 15 year sentence. He tried to appeal 2 years ago but it didn't go through so now we just count down and wait.

It's great you're continuing to focus on the positive even when it gets really negative sometimes.
Kris6578
Kris6578
Thank you all for the responses. Now I sit here worried about my Jon with this storm coming in. He is right outside of Charleston SC So please add him to your prayers. ;-(
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