The easiest thing you can do, and the most important thing, is to keep on loving him and then tell him that you will always be available to listen to whatever he wants to tell you. His heart is breaking, too, and whether or not you believe him or trust him when all is said and done, he needs to know that he still has someone who will listen to him. His soul and his mind can sustain great pain and still come through the ordeal as long as he knows that he hasn't been totally abandoned and rejected.

I have no practical or legal advice to offer, just the words above.

October2014 said it perfect. YOU just keep sticking up for him, and letting him know you will not give up on him. That's the best thing you can do. Some may decide to be human eventually, and if they don't, well, you and him still have that strong connection and it will help him get through this. '
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People don't realize that everyone makes some sort of bad choice from time to time. They are just not the " lucky" one to get caught.

Many will abandon him, and even you for caring about him. That is their loss. I have turned my back on people who don't know the facts but have a wrong opinion of mine.

I don't let them say bad things to me about him without a rebuttal. Some people will just not say anything. Not me! What if it were them, or the people they love. You have to wonder how it would be if it were one of those negative people going through it themselves. You can be sure that they would see it differently.

Things like this show people's true colors. So many people are fakes. They pretend to be good people, but in reality they are harsh, critical fools.

The way our system works, only the people with money get off easy. Public defenders usually don't care and do little for the cases they have. They just collect a paycheck. Make sure he knows that if he don't agree with the public defender, to stand up for himself. He don't have to go with what they tell him to plead.

The news media is a shameful piece of crap, who embellishes stories just to have a story. They will make it worse than it really is. They don't care who it hurts. But unfortunately, the small minded people of the world will believe them.

The internet is a wonderful thing in many ways, but it also lets people see all kinds of information they just don't need to know, especially since half of it is not true.

YOU are going to make a difference to how he gets through this. You just keep doing what you are doing, regardless of what anyone else says or thinks.

Go see him if you can, take his calls if you can afford it, write to him, remember him on holidays and birthdays... write him letters. Letters keep them going. It's a way for them to feel someone cares, and took the time to write. You can keep him updated with everything in life that he would want to know. Keep him part of the outside world that way. Include him in your life through asking him his advice, making him know what he thinks matters still, to you.

If you are in his area, go to court for him. Most people don't have anyone there to listen to their fate. It is vital he has someone there, even though you won't be able to talk to him. It is a silent hug, from behind him in the room that day. He will feel hope because you are there. If you can't be there, because it is too far away, write to him so he gets it right before court, or right before they take him to a prison from the county jail. Give him love and encouragement.

It is a statistical fact that people who have someone supporting them through it all will do better when they get out.

And know you are wonderful for being there for him.

So sorry you are going through this! You have come to the right place. Im fairly new and joining this group has helped me so much. I felt so lost and alone before I found this group. The my family and friends just don't seem to understand. I don't think anyone really does until you go through it!

My is on the run so his picture and crime was on the news and the news has the wrong story making him look worse. I had to fight to get them to get their story straight and even then it was so brief that not many saw the correct story. It was on social media too. He's still on the police wanted list. On their site they didn't correct the link it just don't work.

I have the fugitive task force visit me regularly. Which is humiliating. I can't imagine what the neighbors think.

He's lucky to have you. I will pray for all of you.

It breaks my heart how people are so hateful and judgemental towards the families of a person who gets in trouble with the law. I guess for some people it's easier to think badly than to think that the families are victims too.
I know in the past I have before but I always try to see things from all perspectives.

I even try to see my sons situation through everyone concerneds eyes.

People like that don't understand because they think it can never happen to them. Did we every think it would? I shun those types of idiots. They don't know that any minute it could be THEM dealing with this too.

Thank you all for the replies. I will try to stay positive and support him. It's so hard to see. But I will try to support him the best way I can.

Thank you again

No need for thanks. That's what we all do on here. WE get it. We are dealing with the same feelings and other things. Good luck. Stay on here. We will all help you get through this.