4 weeks ago my family had one of the biggest hits a family can ever take , we found out through various media and then confirmed by the police that my sister in law had been stabbed to death and that my brother 35 years old had been arrested for it, he's now been charged with murder for her and also attempted murder of one his step children (one of hers from a previous relationship) he's set to plead at the end of the month, and saying very little, he's told mum and dad that he did it and intendedto follow through on the child, he doesn't know why (although I don't believe this) he's told us that there is more bad stuff to come out but we don't know what. His solicitor (as is the law) can say very little to us, the police can say very little whilst investigating but we've all been interviewed and my mum and I have given statements for the prosecution to use if they want. I have another younger brother 37 years old that is an alcoholic but won't get help and this has set him off again which has resulted in some atrocious behaviour and the breakdown of his relation ship with his partner and children (one unborn) he wants the rest of the family to cut the youngest brother off and have nothing to do with him , but my parents are so broken about their son the murderer that for another to go off the rails I'm not sure things will ever be the same again . 

All my life I've looked after my family it involved physical, emotional and mental abuse and I only child to come out unscathed by it. I have a loving rock of a husband and 3 lovely boys. I was recently made a disabled wheelchair user after fight with a multilevel disc disease and am just coming out of the other side of that grief. I'm the one that has done all the liaising with family members, calls to police, solicitors ,prepared press statements, organising a way if my boys and mum and dad and us to say goodbye to my little brothers family as we have been (understandably) stopped from any contact with my sister in laws family and funeral. Everyday I deal with mum and dads questions and hurt and anger, guilt etc. I've now put in a request to see my brother in prison, my mum and dad don't or can't at the moment but they need answers and whether I want to or need to doesn't come in to it. I feel obligated as the eldest to go and see him and talk (I don't think he will give permission for the visit) so this may become null and void.

it feels so sad, angry and lonely to be the only one dealing with my own fried at losing both families but not showing it to be strong for mum and dad,my husband and my boys. I'm also trying to sort the partner my alcoholic brother has left with. Only, food, love and support. 

Will it ever end, I know what doesn't kill you just makes you stronger but gosh how much more???

anyone else like this???