Families of Prisoners Support Group
This community is dedicated to families that have been disrupted by prison. Having a loved one incarcerated or having been incarcerated comes with its own unique challenges that require support and understanding. Join the group to find others who know what you're going through, and to seek advice or share your experience.
At 13, my father went to prison. This was a difficult time for me, but I had my best friend, the only person I could count on.
Fast forward to age 20. My father is released. At this point, I'm in love with my best friend.
Then my best friend goes to prison. For six years.
During that time, I marry, have a child, divorce, remarry, have two more children, then become widowed at 26.
He is released recently after I am widowed. We are now two states away, but met up as our friendship has always been so strong we knew we could help each other.
The chemistry was so strong we couldn't help but half 3 very amazing, passionate days. But once I went home, and reality set in, I knew it was unrealistic and I wasn't ready.
A month later, he meets someone and married her quickly after. I think at 29, he was just trying to catch up on life.
Her influence on his lifestyle led him to make bad choices and land himself back in jail in March on a parole violation.
I wrote him the beginning of May. We have written every day since... He has filed for divorce and we have shared how we are ready to quit fighting what we have spent over ten years fighting! We know our love is strong enough...
But now I find myself, yet again, in the position of doing an "outside sentence." No idea how long he will do for the parole violation yet.
I don't know what to tell my friends/family without them judging me. But he's more myself than I am; whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same. I can't ignore it anymore.
So... How do you wait? How do you stay strong and keep your head together, hold everything down?
I've waited this long for him, I'm not afraid to wait a bit longer. But while he calls me his angel and says he feels my strength lifting him up from the darkest place in his life... I'm actually scared shitless.
Sorry for the long post... I just have not spoke of this to anyone and it's a lot to process.
You cannot help who you love no matter what people say or how they feel.
As far as how do you wait? Most of us are waiting.... whether it's a few months or a few years we're all doing outside sentences and it's not easy. Me personally I have my hard days and I have my easy days.... I try to keep myself busy I work I write I find things to do. And I also talk to my fiancé like 2x a day at the least. It's not too expensive here but some places it is.
You hold everything together the same way you would if he was home.... it will not always be easy but it won't always be hard either! And if all else fails and you need to talk or just someone to listen to then you know where to find us. If no one understands we do!
Positive thoughts and prayers your way!