Im in shock. Stephen was just picked up on a probation violation. Im not sure what to do. At this moment, Im just numb I think. Im totally terrified of what comes next. He was supposed to stay away from my place of work that is part of his probation requirements. Well, he needed some money so he stopped by so I could give it to him. Well, stupid me, I forgot my atm card at my desk and had to run back up and get it. During that time, someone must have spotted him and reported him. Last I saw of him, I gave him a quick kiss, and he was out the door to catch the bus. Shortly after that, a campus police officer was at my desk to talk to me. She told me he had been spotted and arrested. I felt like I was punched in the gut, no, not punched, more like hit with a 2 by 4. Hes been taken to their police station and I guess they will contact his probation officer. I do not know what is going to happen from here. I am terrified. Violation of his terms could mean 18 months straight time. I dont know what I am going to do. Will they throw him in jail for this minor violation? To make matters worse, and this is what really scares me, he tested positive for drugs the last time he saw his po. She told him he had to immediately go to an assessment center and get evaluated for alcohol and drug abuse usage and he did it. Of course, they recommended inpatient treatment, which is something we cant afford. We had looked up NA meetings in our area and he was going to start going to those (he hadnt gotten the courage to go yet). She could have revoked his probation right then and there, but she gave him a chance. Hes been in job skills training, and just had one more week left and they were going to place him in a job. I actually thought we were on the right track. Now its crashing in on me. If he had anything on him (you know what I mean), I know for sure its over, hes in for sure. The worst thing is, I dont know what is happening. I just have to sit and wait until someone contacts me, or I find something out. And we all know these things can take forever. Im not sure what I am going to do. Literally, I am just numb. Surprisingly, I am not crying, for some reason, there are no tears at this point. I guess that will come later perhaps it hasnt hit me yet, but rest assured it will. PLEASE, have good thoughts for Steve and his situation. I know this is all our fault for him coming here and violating the terms, but maybe, just maybe they will give him another chance. Sorry this is soo long; Im just so lost right now. Keep me in your thoughts as well, I need all the prayers and good wishes that I can get. Thank you all.
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