It's normal and iam kinda the same my loves stuff is still pretty much where he left it....he can sort it out when his home.

lol... just wanted to make sure I wasn't losing it... ha ha.. thanks for sharing your thoughts.

You are not crazy at all. When my husband was sentenced, I went straight home and got the shirt he wore the day before out of the laundry basket. I put the shirt in an airtight zip lock bag. Every now and then, I open the bag briefly in order to "smell" his scent. It makes me feel closer to him when I am feeling low!

Oh my goodness, the shirt! Can I just tell you I wasn't with him the day he got arrested and we had argued the night before he went out of town so I decided to make up for it and clean up the house, do all the laundry, make the bed, etc... So by the time I found out what had happened I had no clothes left that smelled like him. Plus with the explosion that happened at the jail I can't even get the clothes he was wearing when they took him in. It breaks my heart, you never realize how much you're going to miss the smell. I still have his cologne and I spray it every now and then on my pillow. I think we all have those little things we do to keep them close to us.

It's funny you all smell their shirts and clothes. I always did that and now that he deserted me, I have ONE shirt he wore before he left, and I sleep with it smelling it when I go to sleep. The smell is already dissipating a bit, and that made me cry too. I desperately tried to sniff out a spot that still does smell like him. I cried because it's going away.

I used to think I was kinda sick, that a shrink would have a field day with that fact. But then they never probably lost anyone as we do.

When the smell goes away, I still have his after shave I can spray on it. But that's not the same. Won't have the other smells. What am I supposed to do, put his deodorant on it too?

It gives us their scent, which we miss.

I also always put his things out. I kept them where they were til he got arrested, then when moved they went back in drawers and closet. Now he took almost everything that was his, and I look at the closet and drawers and sob. It's an awful feeling to be in their life so long, to love them, defend them, stand by them, and then he just leaves with no fight, no warning and refuses to be a part of my life anymore. BUT he is still texting and calling, so there is a smidge of hope.

You all keep those things, and pray that they return the same man you always loved. Mine turned into a monster.

Most don't... Mine did.

I pulled my 29 year old daughter's stuffed animals and dolls out of the attic and set them out.

I'm really glad to hear you have a new place to call home.

NO! you are not crazy. When my man when to prison. I took a few of his shirts, aftershave, cologne, and a few items to have in my room. These things routinely get me through tough days, and remind me that there is an end to his incarceration sentence. I spray his cologne on my sheets or pillow, and it feels like he never left sometimes. And seeing his clothes in my closet, feels like he is just gone for a few days. I keep photos of us up in my room, and we get photos together when i visit him at the prison. All the little details make things easier for us.
YOU ARE NOT CRAZY. SOUNDS LIKE A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP

thank you all for giving your thoughts. I love this man more than anythng. I worry that him being in there will change him or make him resent me for some of this... I have no part in this but to be there for him. i don't judge him. I just listen and give my advise. I tell him how upset it makes me that I can't do more. I want to marry this man. Having his things around me and with me it entitles me that I will see him again.. Its silly but I have to have him around me. reminding me that he will be home soon. even if it is a couple years away...

I know what all of you mean by the shirts. I have a few of his shirts and athletic shorts that he used to wear that all smell like him... I wore one so far. I also have a sweatshirt with his last name on it. He calls it his flag! lol.. he loves that I wear it pronouncing him as mine. We do love each other. I hope that this won't break us...

I sleep in his clothes and use his toothbrush. :)

It's amazing how the smallest things can turn out to be the most important in our life....yes I am also talking about "THE SMELL" before my husband was sent to prison he bought me a life sized winnie the pooh bear that was holding a honey pot. He always,always called me honey.when he was sent upstate I took one of his t shirts and put it on the bear, at night I would put it behind me so I could fall asleep to his smell. also if I woke in the middle of the night I felt someone behind me and I could fool myself it was him due to the scent. It worked for years until the sun started to come up and light came into the room and I could see it was not him.Then the loneliness came back.well it has been 8 yrs. Im kind of use to the loneliness . DONT WORRY BELIEVE ME THAT IS NORMAL. at times I pull out old clothing of his and sleep in it(after 8 yrs the scent is fading) but I have all his different colognes. If I ever run out I'll just go out a buy more until he comes home.Nothing like the real thing.so you do whatever gets you through the day!