Families of Prisoners Support Group

This community is dedicated to families that have been disrupted by prison. Having a loved one incarcerated or having been incarcerated comes with its own unique challenges that require support and understanding. Join the group to find others who know what you're going through, and to seek advice or share your experience.

1,470 Members

7,146 Posts

0 Online

cstan62 10/24/2011

My son has been in prison for 9 months...sentenced to 6 yrs. and eligible for early release in 3 1/2. He has been attacked by other inmates twice in 3 mo. and put in segregation both times. The last time was last Fri. when he was coming back from commissary...his commissary stolen. They say he's in the hole for his protection. But it is the absolute worst punishment for him...worse than getting beat up. He's willing to waive any rights for "protection" to get out of the hole, but they still keep him there. The thought of him just laying there staring at the ceiling...especially when he's the victim is killing me. The deputy warden practically laughed at me for being concerned. Is anyone else this angry for their attitude? I feel so sick, angry, frustrated that I don't know how to function anymore. Like others, I never thought this would happen to us...

deleted_user 10/25/2011

I wish I had some practical advice to give you, and I hope that others do. I do offer you my prayers though and I understand your pain. As parents we spend so much time thinking about what our child is needing and feeling at every moment, and then figuring out how to meet their needs. I think it's natural for our minds to keep going there, especially when they are in prison. I struggle with that too. I'm glad your son has you in his life to care about him and I'll be praying for you today, for you to find practical ways to help your son, and for your heart. Hugs. :)

deleted_user 10/26/2011

I cstan62. i am experiencing a similar situation with my son. He's been harrassed by an officer he wrote a grievance on because she disrespected him. As a result, he's been put in confinement and had some of his property distroyed. I am praying for God to intervene and protect him. I pray the same for you. our children are paying for their wrong doings and those in charge are just mean for no reason. My thoughts of him iin that situation saddens me, but I am trusting God. I am keeping the faith. I keep praying constantly for God to keep him save and to soften the hearts of the officers and warden. i am trying to stay encouraged, but it not easy. But I know that God will deliver him. Keep the faith and stay encouraged.

cstan62 10/26/2011

Thank you, elizabethgfl...I've prayed for so long and so hard for safety, strength and peace for all the inmates. But after this happened I became so discouraged. Today my husband went to see Matthew and they wouldn't let him because there was an investigation going on...But HE was the one attacked. Why wouldn't they let his mom and dad come see him? The inmates here are allowed visitors even when they are in segregation. This doesn't make sense. It's so hard to keep the faith when these things keep happening, but I'll try..thank you for the encouragement and prayers. I'll pray for your child too.

ihatewisconsin 10/27/2011

If this helps at all, my son was in solitary for something he didn't do and the guards said yea they could prove it but wouldn't. He was only in 11 days. He made it ok.

My other person was in 4 mos!!! He said it was boring but he just slept away the days, and actually after awhile he got used to it. At first when they let him out, he didn't like being out. He liked the privacy of the solitary room, and it was safer. They somehow adapt to those situations. I couldn't, I don't think, but they put their head into a mindset to handle most anything.

Im sorry he is going through this but mine made it ok, yours will too.

After he was in awhile they let him have his radio, then later his tv, so he was fairly content. I would go stark raving mad.

cstan62 10/27/2011

I can't imagine 4 mo. of solitary...Thank you for your encouraging words....

ihatewisconsin 10/27/2011

I hope it helps. I think sometimes we take all this harder. They do adapt. And if there were problems with the other guys, then maybe it is safer for him to be in there for awhile. I actually felt safer for him even though it drove me crazy thinking about him locked in a closet like place. I would of been nuts. He wasn't. Im sure your son will be fine. I have went through this many years with 2 people, mostly in at the same time. It is so hard, but we have to find a way to cope. If they think we are stressed because of it they have a harder time. Sometimes when we talk to them, just avoid those kind of subjects.

Join the Conversation