Families & Friends Of Addicts Support Group
Addiction affects more than just the individual. This community is dedicated to the families and friends of individuals suffering from any form of addiction. Mental health professionals are increasingly considering alcoholism and addiction as diseases that flourish in and are enabled by family systems. Family members react to the addicted person with particular behavioral...
so i know most or all of us here, our lives have been affected bot positively and badly by the addiction of someone dear to us.
I have been, continue to be affected by the addict. and it's sad.
My question here is, if you are to continue or re-start a relationship (romantic) with an addict, what would be on your non-negotiables list?
Non-negotiables, standards which you will NEVER be willing to break or compromise. Standards you will be strict about. To protect yourself. A.K.A. boundaries...
Thoughts?
I have been, continue to be affected by the addict. and it's sad.
My question here is, if you are to continue or re-start a relationship (romantic) with an addict, what would be on your non-negotiables list?
Non-negotiables, standards which you will NEVER be willing to break or compromise. Standards you will be strict about. To protect yourself. A.K.A. boundaries...
Thoughts?
honesty, communication, fidelity, commitment, integrity, loyalty, friendship, like mindedness in goals and spirituality, respect...and I can't think of any others (tired from traveling)...but that would all be my minimum requirements.
I wanted a man who would worship the ground I walked on...and not in a princess way, in a value me as a person way...and I called it out into the universe as I drove across country to relocate and start my life over, and I met the man I had hoped for,sooner than I was ready, and took the leap of faith to try again.
As to the addict part? I told my future daughter in law that if my son ever went back to using anything she was to kick him out immediately. because if that didn't give him a wake up call he was going to have to be thrown out soon anyway....kids, no kids, no excuses. And she agreed to it. My son knows too. he agreed to it.
I spent wasted years on someone sick in mind and spirit and he wasn't an addict (till years after I moved on) and I stayed because I felt I couldn't leave someone who was sick. HA,,,,he got engaged to someone else while living with me...but don't worry...he didn't marry her---- he married the girl he was cheating on both of us with!!! And I cried. I should have been dancing. Now I say "thank you God that he left me"
don't be the old me. be free. it is so much nicer to find someone on an equal or higher plain that can lift you up and grow with you and not beat you down and destroy you.
I keep saying it. MOVE ON