so happy for you that he is doing well and wanting the help! take it one day at a time! he's alive and well

Things are good now and that is a start! He is berry lucky to have you as a parent and I really hope things go well this time.

Marg,,, it is so important right to set boundaries, sign a contract of things he is able to do, and what he is not ,, an addict needs direction especially when they are not using,,,, it is possible to continue to detach,,, it does not mean not caring,,, please to not become consumed with your son,, it drive you insane especially if they are living in the home,,,, make sure that he sets goals, but from experience don't nag,,, say what you mean, mean what you say,,, it's very important for your son to get into a recovery program, where there is fellowship with other recovering addicts,, unfortunately there is no way of you stopping in from using, however by setting boundaries you make it a lot harder for them to just walk out the door,,, if for some reason you find what he is saying "unbelievable" you do have every right to question, just don't interrogate,,,, in the beginning stages of recovery,, they do need unconditional support, however don't request respect, demand it,,, but without arguing,,,
Your going to be going through a lot if emotions which are going to make you feel like your in a tunnel of no return,,, simply breath,,,

When katelin got of jail,, first was a sense of relief, which then followed by this over whelming love,, I just wanted to hold her and never let her go,,, but then it became a smothering effect,,, over a course if time the anger step in,, because she no longer was this innocent child that I brought into this world, has she felt the need to open up, and told me things,, that never in my wildest dreams would think this beautiful child if mine was cable of doing, but when they are using, they go into survival mode, which the chemicals in their brain, are so messed up from the constant "fix" their body craves, and the emotion of living, caring for another person becomes numbed,,,
It's been 50 days since she has used,, when she first got of jail, I thought the six months behind bars, would fix her need to use,, that lasted three days , I was devasted, I could not believe heroin continued to still Beable to get a hold if her,,, so do make this as short as possible,,,, rehap, relaspse, living somewhere, sober living home ,,and then the last attempt or hope,, call it what you want,, we brought her back into our home ( she also has a five year old that I felt she need to realize her responsibilities) well has I said going on 50 days,,, I don't know what tomorrow will bring,, I'm prepared for a parents worse nightmare,,, I or we support her sobriety 100%,,, she has very low self esteem ,, which is very hard to see, cause she was a very confident, strong girl before drugs,, we continue to practice positive thinking,,,,

Marge,,, has a parent we love our children unconditionally ,, and had long as they breath there is hope,,, don't give in,,, but never give up,,,

It's okay to cry,,, but also detach from the addict, and connect to your son,,, laugh until it hurts

Hugs
Kim

I do know that in AA they have some dual diagnosis groups...perhaps they have them with narc anon...I also have read that several of the members in the AA group on DS are suffering from a variety of mental issues.
I hope that feeling better will help him stay sober.
I understand that crying with gratitude....and loving them so much it hurts. I am happy he is safe.

Praising that he is alive and home right along with you! blessings on each day.. K

God has a plan for him Marg, and he certainly has had a. Guardian angel and with no doubt your live mid support guiding him. Keep trying to get him in somewhere so he can get the helps he needs, and so you will have some piece of mind as well, I'm so happy for you and our family. One day at a time that is all any of us can really do.