Welcome to the ugly dark world of addiction,,comming here is one the most comforting,compassionate , supportive group of people,, everyone of us do know what your going through, how you feel,, addiction is not prejudice, regardless of the drugs, it knocks on the door if the rich or poor, black or white,,,,, never in a million years did I ever think I would have a junkie,,, my definition of one is some ugly, homeless person that has no one that cares,,, well my junkie is quite the opposite,, she is a beautiful, intelligent, comes from a good home,, has plenty of support,,, many times I asked myself why,,,,,,today I'm in a much better place then I was two years ago,because I've Educated, listen, and stopped being in denial,, here are a few things though would be helpful,,,


,, what you need is to set boundaries, quit enabling,, say what you mean,, mean what you say,,, educate yourself on addiction,,, an addict will only accept the need to change when, the pain of changing becomes less then the pain of remaining an active user,,, tough love does not mean not loving,, it means I love you do much that I'm done doing things for you, because those things make it easier for you to continue to use,, not making excuses for you or lie ,,,it's time for an addict to take responsibility,,,

Addiction is a disease of the mind,, they cannot control the impulse to use, they have grown physically and psychologically dependent on their effects,,, relaspse occurs before the drug is actually taken ,,,

We do not have control , nor can we cure or are we the cause of an addicts use,,, learn to detach from the addict,, seperate yourself emotionally from the damaging effects if the addict,, don't do things they should be doing themselves, don't bend over backwards to rescue or save them from consequences

My addict is my 23 year old daughter,, started as pills,, which then became heroin cause it was cheaper,, she has been in jail for her consequences the hardest thing I ever did was say no,, enough is enough,,, I visit her every Monday, write letters.
, raising her little girl ,,, but I refuse to allow myself ever to become consumed with an addict ever again,,, it made me physically , emotionally sick,,,, came to a point,,, there was nothing I could do,,, but take care of me! She is out now, we had the biggest breakthrough ,, she came to me, when she had a hard moment, and even though while for six months she did not use , she had that urge,, in the past she would start a fight, and that would be her escape to use,,,, I worked her through it, with the tools I learned, gave love, put kept my boundaries in place, I detach from my addict,, gave her the phone and simply, calmly said you have a choice,,, call a recovery group ( which are recovery addicts ,,) and ask to be picked up, or you can leave the house, with bags packed ,, I can not be part if that world,,,,, she choice to go and stay at the recovery house,, and today I can say she is doing very well,,, I step back. This is her recovery,,, I have my own,, does not mean I don't love her, or turned my back,,, it means I have to only control my surroundings




Release let go, and let God,,, you have no control,, addicts lie, manipulate,, and will tell you things to feel sorry for them,,,, don't become an addict to your addict ,,, it's a ugly dark world
Until the pain of addiction is worse then the pleasure if the drug, the addict has no reason to quit,,,,

Good luck,, and continue with this site,,, this is my life line,, find a meeting for yourself,,, keep busy, join a hip hop dance class ,, keep your mind busy,

Hugs
Kim
K when you see that cardinal in a tree think of me,,,here for you all
Posted on 04/12/12, 08:10 pm