Families & Friends Of Addicts Support Group
Addiction affects more than just the individual. This community is dedicated to the families and friends of individuals suffering from any form of addiction. Mental health professionals are increasingly considering alcoholism and addiction as diseases that flourish in and are enabled by family systems. Family members react to the addicted person with particular behavioral...
still missing my recovering addict, wondering how he is doing and what he is doing...and hoping he will contact me soon. it's been 6 months of no contact, no news from him at all.
what could the no contact mean? could he be recovering well? could it mean that life is more relaxed and better without me... since he sees me as a pressure ( well for me it's more of like he is seeing me s getting in the why)... why can's he just reach out? or is he still fighting his demons and active in his addiction? is it that really crazy and hard that they will be willing to lose their loved ones for it... if they love someone so dearly, is that love not enough to make them stop?
there are times i think about being the one to reach out... to give in... to settle things once and for all. but then i also think that if he wants to have a conversation with me.. work things out, he would have done that himself.. why do i feel the pressure and the guilt that i have to try it our more time...
i got a bday greeting from his sister and she said that she still prays that we end up...in time.. and that the addict reminded her that its my bday..
i got so annoyed with that text.. i appreciate them and i love them.. but that kind of text is not helping me at all. until when will i hope? its been 6 months... there are days i feel hopeful.. days when i feel so hopeless..
time's passing and why is he not doing anything.. he is not even worried to lose me fully? how come i feel scared to fully let go, and he doesn't care a bit! should i develop more compassion and understanding. he is on his 1.5 yrs to recovery... its weird. the situation is weird.
it's sad that i really wanna work it out, but nothing on his side tells me, no indication that he is doing something about US. he is just focused on himself.
On my bday i received a bouquet of flowers with no note. Annoying. It might have come from him, but it could be anybody...
Also, i have not been attending my meetings. I am coping by keeping busy.. by talking to friends and by reading self-help posts and reading other stories here in DS..
when will it ever work out.
what could the no contact mean? could he be recovering well? could it mean that life is more relaxed and better without me... since he sees me as a pressure ( well for me it's more of like he is seeing me s getting in the why)... why can's he just reach out? or is he still fighting his demons and active in his addiction? is it that really crazy and hard that they will be willing to lose their loved ones for it... if they love someone so dearly, is that love not enough to make them stop?
there are times i think about being the one to reach out... to give in... to settle things once and for all. but then i also think that if he wants to have a conversation with me.. work things out, he would have done that himself.. why do i feel the pressure and the guilt that i have to try it our more time...
i got a bday greeting from his sister and she said that she still prays that we end up...in time.. and that the addict reminded her that its my bday..
i got so annoyed with that text.. i appreciate them and i love them.. but that kind of text is not helping me at all. until when will i hope? its been 6 months... there are days i feel hopeful.. days when i feel so hopeless..
time's passing and why is he not doing anything.. he is not even worried to lose me fully? how come i feel scared to fully let go, and he doesn't care a bit! should i develop more compassion and understanding. he is on his 1.5 yrs to recovery... its weird. the situation is weird.
it's sad that i really wanna work it out, but nothing on his side tells me, no indication that he is doing something about US. he is just focused on himself.
On my bday i received a bouquet of flowers with no note. Annoying. It might have come from him, but it could be anybody...
Also, i have not been attending my meetings. I am coping by keeping busy.. by talking to friends and by reading self-help posts and reading other stories here in DS..
when will it ever work out.
the bad news is that he might be happier in whatever situation he is in when he is not worrying about being in a relationship with you....using or sober... or he feels he is doing you a favor.
listen, you can wait forever or go on and make yourself happy.
we can't control what happens to us, but we can control what we do about it. live in the present.
Addicts are a crafty bunch. The "no contact" could mean that he's truly working on himself, that he's trying to give you your space, or that he's waiting for you to cave and contact him and take him back, addiction and all.
We all think if we gave the one more chance, that they will be who we want them to be. But, that's not up to us. They are who they are and will make their changes when they're ready. Sometime they are never ready.
It's good that you're keeping busy and keeping in touch with friends. You should also be going to your meetings. Take care of you. It would be healthy for you to start to live a life without him.