Families & Friends Of Addicts Support Group
Addiction affects more than just the individual. This community is dedicated to the families and friends of individuals suffering from any form of addiction. Mental health professionals are increasingly considering alcoholism and addiction as diseases that flourish in and are enabled by family systems. Family members react to the addicted person with particular behavioral...
I'm stuck and don't no what to do. How do you help some one that won't help them selves?
I'm a married mother of three ( one is in heaven ). I think that's how I got to this page.
My hubby is struggling with alcohol.
It started with his best mate committing suicide on 2.10.11 They were really close but he never told a sole that he wanted to die. There were no signs.
Five months later 26.3.12 I gave birth to a baby girl who died during labor, the baby was going to be our savvier , something for us to look forward to.
Since then I go to councelling, but he won't.
He drinks a six pack + a day during the week and on the weekends there is no limit.
His job is very stressful and demanding but won't quit as its great money, but it adds to his stress and his drinking.
He becomes abusive, mental,verbal, and rarely physical.
I've tried all the 'do it for us' , ' do it for you ' stuff.
He has driven while drunk and has crashed but lies to me saying he hit a dog a few times, a dog wouldn't take off a quarter panel on a SUV. He sneaks and hides his drinking. Lies about where he is. Spends $100+ a week on bottle shops.
He admits his problem but won't help him self.
What do I do?
I'm a married mother of three ( one is in heaven ). I think that's how I got to this page.
My hubby is struggling with alcohol.
It started with his best mate committing suicide on 2.10.11 They were really close but he never told a sole that he wanted to die. There were no signs.
Five months later 26.3.12 I gave birth to a baby girl who died during labor, the baby was going to be our savvier , something for us to look forward to.
Since then I go to councelling, but he won't.
He drinks a six pack + a day during the week and on the weekends there is no limit.
His job is very stressful and demanding but won't quit as its great money, but it adds to his stress and his drinking.
He becomes abusive, mental,verbal, and rarely physical.
I've tried all the 'do it for us' , ' do it for you ' stuff.
He has driven while drunk and has crashed but lies to me saying he hit a dog a few times, a dog wouldn't take off a quarter panel on a SUV. He sneaks and hides his drinking. Lies about where he is. Spends $100+ a week on bottle shops.
He admits his problem but won't help him self.
What do I do?
I'm Lindsay and if you ever need to talk then *please* don't be afraid to message me
Men can't mourn. they get angry. you get sad...so they get wasted. or it is the opposite and the woman gets a mess...but since they usually are caring for the kids, it seems in my limited experience to be the guys.
There is no excuse for physical abuse. If he lays a hand on you, or threatens to, call the police. Maybe that would be a wake up call for him. And you know there is no tolerance for drinking and driving. What does your councelor say about it all?
and are your children safe?
You know the truth about the situation, so now, what to do about it is up to you. I am just asking you to remember, it is not just you being exposed to this behavior, and children have a tendency to follow in their parent's footsteps. a daughter, to live with the abuse you go through, and a son, to be a drunk abuser. Something to think about as well.
Anyway, welcome to our group. please come back and share more.
My first husband did that to me and I did not put up with that (he did not drink tho). I ended up leaving to my Moms and after he refused to go to counseling, I asked for a divorce.
Now I am with my second husband who used to drink (been sober for 7 mos. now) he had an episode during this past summer where he broke a whole bunch of stuff in the house. This to me was my "bottom" I put my foot down and told him if he didn't stop and go to AA I was going to leave him.
He went inpatient for a week (after suicidal thoughts etc.) and when he got out went straight to AA everyday. He made it a routine to go to the 7am meeting solid for about 3 mos. Now that he has a handle on his drinking he is going about 3 times a week. He is happy now and so am I.
I hope you get him to AA, it has been a life saver for us (he got a mentor that helped him with his day to day struggles, someone he could talk to that has been there).