Families & Friends Of Addicts Support Group
Addiction affects more than just the individual. This community is dedicated to the families and friends of individuals suffering from any form of addiction. Mental health professionals are increasingly considering alcoholism and addiction as diseases that flourish in and are enabled by family systems. Family members react to the addicted person with particular behavioral...
During the last couple weeks I have read some life changing books that were free on my kindle. Awareness of the heart and experiencing divine presence which were answers to my prayers...literally. These books said everything I needed to hear about my own feelings and thoughts....my essence of who I am and how we have to look within ourselves for our answers... Ive also read other books recently that helped me put all this in perspective. Soul DNA and some other spiritual books and universal law stuff I had never heard of.....My AH continues to get drunk every day after work to the point I can hardly look at him. We had some serious talks last week and still he continues.. I haven't slept in our bed with him in 3 days because he passes out on couch and gets up later to go to bed...at like midnight while I'm still up and feels bad bout himself..the other mint he threw down his plate and chased our 9 yr.old to his bedroom and almost gave me a heart attack. He knocked the baby down one night....he tells our 7 yr. Old she is hot...tonight he tried to sleep in her bed saying he has nowhere else to sleep. Thank goodness he got out of there but says I wont come sleep with him..and I told him no because u r wasted. I just don't know whhat to do anymore. I know I don't deserve this and neither do the kids..He took the kids to a car show this weekend so that was nice but then comes home and gets sloppy drunk...I know that Ive been trying to make a decision about my Husbands drinking and what to do and I don't see any other way than to just up and leave very soon. I cant imagine living like this anymore and where I used to feel bad about that thought I am now sure this is what I need to do but don't know where to go...ughhh. feel stuck!!
A 7 year old being called "hot" is something that gives me the creeps. Trying to sleep in her bed? Drunk?!
What are your options?
In my mind I see the old robot from lost in space flailing his arms yelling "danger, will robinson, danger"
seriously? that crossed a line. Big time.
Think we are jumping the gun? Go lurk on the alcoholism page, or ask them if they thought it was dangerous...a bunch of drunks in recovery (or trying) will tell you.
What would you tell a friend if you read your post?
Prayers for safety for your family are on my list today.
If you don't want to sleep with him, sleep with your daughter, at least he won't....but then, little boys can get molested also.
Evelven days ago, I made my husband leave. He is on pills and I suspect heroin. His behavior got so bad my sons' therapist said if things didn't change, she would have to call CPS.
My husband was emotionally abusive to the kids, and when I wasn't home he would threaten them that if they told me, he was make life bad for them
We had a tropical storm go thru at the end of August, and we had a leaky roof I had been after him to fix for months. Well he waiting until we were getting rain and tropical force winds to send my 11 son on the roof to stretch out a tarp. (We live in a trailer, so think metal pitched roof)
It was hard making him leave. I knew if I made him leave, he would get worse. I knew that he would fall farther into adddiction. And he has. He looks like a homeless person. He's living in a flea bag motel and I am afraid he is going to end up dead or in jail.
But as hard as it is to see him like that, I had to do what I did. I HAD to put my kids first. It does hurt, but I know that I will get thru it and I know thiungs will be for the best in the long run.
Part of me wants to call my husband and tell him to come home and we will fix things, that we will get him into a rehab and back into NA and we will go to counseling....
But first of all it is NOT my job to get him to seek help. Only HE can do that. Plus while he is still an addict and acting like an addict, he cannot be around the kids.
PM me if you need to. HUGS
Re-read your post,,, your better off in a woman's shelter,,,
You said you don't want to live like this anymore. So, back to the main question: what are your options? Write them down, every single one with its pros and cons. You could start by writing about the do nothing approach. List the pros and cons. Then continue.. Consider it an exercise. It's quite helpful and pretty empowering, although it can be overwhelming.. Include the effects each option has on your children.
Baby steps..
People are here to help, not to judge. I believe I see progress in your posts- that you are beginning to figure out what is the biggest worry and what can wait. It is normal and very natural to want to think the best of those we love, like your husband. I hope you are finding the strength to see that his behavior has a very good chance of causing serious harm to you and your children. He doesn't seem to be able to help himself. It is all up to you and any supports you can find in your community to protect you all. You are in my prayers.