Families & Friends Of Addicts Support Group

Addiction affects more than just the individual. This community is dedicated to the families and friends of individuals suffering from any form of addiction. Mental health professionals are increasingly considering alcoholism and addiction as diseases that flourish in and are enabled by family systems. Family members react to the addicted person with particular behavioral...

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I Don't Count

deehigs
deehigs
It's so not fair that I don't count ... On how to live my own life ... I don't count... On having peace in my heart and head... I don't count On being proud of my son and his accomplishments... I don't count On looking into those eyes to see some glimer of hope that it's all gonna be ok... I don't count On trying to not doubt his words.... I don't count On having that awful pit in my gut tell me somethings wrong ...I don't count On running back and forth to the hospital / doctors/ rehab/ jail ...I don't count On trying to keep it together... I don't count For if I did none of this would be... and we would still be a happy family.The only thing that counts these days is drugs and lies and wrongful ways... How did things get to be, where the only things that count are things that were never meant to be?
hopingforsunnydays
hopingforsunnydays
Hugs out to you deehigs, sounds like today is not so good. Keep this in mind: YOU DO COUNT, YOUR THOUGHTS COUNT and you CAN COUNT on the sun setting tonight and rising again tomorrow with a new day ahead of you. You can COUNT on the fact that no matter WHAT happens YOU are in control of your own life always. We all are. You can COUNT on support from here, , hopefully one day we won't all need each others' support.
YOU CAN COUNT ON YOU!
AND you can COUNT on NONE of this is your doing! You can COUNT on your hope, your love.

You can count on all of us wanting YOU to have a better day today and COUNT on the endless prayers that are being said for you.
cardinal39
cardinal39
Dee, you have to detach from the addict, your letting his addiction consume you,, don't get offended, but get off the pity train, and shout to the world you do count!!,, unfortunately in an addicts world that's all they care about his the drugs,,, let him,, care enough not to care,, you can't stop him from using I posted something about detachment read it,, go to a nar-anon meeting, you realize when your surrounded by people physically that are in the same boat,, you count there! This site we have all been there just with different scenero, guess you count here!!!

Don't become addicted to your addict, it will make you insane!

Hugs
Kim
deehigs
deehigs
I know you are both right it is just so dam hard to not be addicted to my addict you put your own life on hold when you become a mom and that is fine but to put all your love time energy etc into your child for 18 years and then have them turn around and do drugs and almost destroy everything you've ever done for them is so heartbreaking to watch. I am still pretty new at this and in the learning phase but I really do appreciate everyones advice I'm gonna find a meeting to attend I think it's time thanks dee
blueviolet725
blueviolet725
you sound just like I felt. Eventually you become so tired you are either bitter, or you do learn to take care of yourself.
If loving them and praying for them was enough, we wouldn't have addicts. And sometimes you have to let them sit and stew in their own messes...so hard, because as you said, our whole life was about protecting them...
raising kids is the only relationship that if you do it right, they are supposed to leave you.
Keep coming back, we all get it. we have been there. meanwhile, take a walk or a hot bath, cry or punch a pillow, and breathe deeply. try to take care of you.