Families & Friends Of Addicts Support Group
Addiction affects more than just the individual. This community is dedicated to the families and friends of individuals suffering from any form of addiction. Mental health professionals are increasingly considering alcoholism and addiction as diseases that flourish in and are enabled by family systems. Family members react to the addicted person with particular behavioral...
Hi
Fort those who may remember my husband is an addict, he left this past July saying" I treat him like shit" but was heavely involved in cocaine use.
Last year he was seeing a pain specialist who treats Narcotic addicts with Suboxone , however, my husband who was once active in NA was not attending meetings. We had reconciled after a separation/filed for divorce a short time before that but for other reasons, one being my involvement with someone else and he finding another relationship too. I also think he was using then too.
So, I see him today to talk about our divorce. The house is basically the only big asset to decide on. His business, or what is left of it is in the basement, flooring business. He says I can live in the home and he will continue to live at his brother's and help him out. He is a paraplegic.
My husband was being very complient and obviously feeling the bitter side of waking up to the reality he has lost me. This time I think he knows it is different. See, this time after 26 years I woke up. I realize he may never fully recover and I learned how mean has been over the years when using. Don't get me wrong I have not been a princess but would never pull some of the mean things he has done.
He says we can keep the house jointly and sell it down the road. I like this idea b/c we will lose our shirts if we sell now. I'm not sure how I will afford it and actually I do not even think my husband is of sound mind. I noticed he had his wedding band back on and he asked me for a kiss goodbye. i told him I can't but he said "how bout on the cheek.
I really do not want to soften to him. I want to go through with this divorce. I just cannot go through this again 2 or 3 years down the road.
He would not even admit what he did wrong today. He really thinks I'm going to take him back when he won't even admit he was using and put me through hell.
Any thoughts?
Fort those who may remember my husband is an addict, he left this past July saying" I treat him like shit" but was heavely involved in cocaine use.
Last year he was seeing a pain specialist who treats Narcotic addicts with Suboxone , however, my husband who was once active in NA was not attending meetings. We had reconciled after a separation/filed for divorce a short time before that but for other reasons, one being my involvement with someone else and he finding another relationship too. I also think he was using then too.
So, I see him today to talk about our divorce. The house is basically the only big asset to decide on. His business, or what is left of it is in the basement, flooring business. He says I can live in the home and he will continue to live at his brother's and help him out. He is a paraplegic.
My husband was being very complient and obviously feeling the bitter side of waking up to the reality he has lost me. This time I think he knows it is different. See, this time after 26 years I woke up. I realize he may never fully recover and I learned how mean has been over the years when using. Don't get me wrong I have not been a princess but would never pull some of the mean things he has done.
He says we can keep the house jointly and sell it down the road. I like this idea b/c we will lose our shirts if we sell now. I'm not sure how I will afford it and actually I do not even think my husband is of sound mind. I noticed he had his wedding band back on and he asked me for a kiss goodbye. i told him I can't but he said "how bout on the cheek.
I really do not want to soften to him. I want to go through with this divorce. I just cannot go through this again 2 or 3 years down the road.
He would not even admit what he did wrong today. He really thinks I'm going to take him back when he won't even admit he was using and put me through hell.
Any thoughts?
you did not give up,, you surrendered,,,God wants us to be happy, peacefull, and full of love,,,,beleive,,,, absoultly forgive him,,, don't carry on a hatred.. your only allowing Satan to rule your life, if you don't forgive,,, cast away your fears, and worries,,,, Be happy sister,,,I'm proud of you!
Stay strong. I used to tell myself if AH really does quit and starts to make positive progress and this keeps up we could always get back together. We didn't, but that thought process helped me move on.
Your doing great, stay strong!
Today is sort of a hard day. I haven't cried an over a week, but today I am feeling the loss. Seein him yesterday made me sad. He didn't look good and he tried to kiss me goodbye. I said no and turned my cheek. It was really, really, hard.
Divorce and addiction are tough. There's no guidebook, only prayers and support for comfort. Best of everything to you in this...
I seriously do consider your advice and will def. talk with my lawyer who will mediate for my husband and I which I am very pleased about. Can't wait till he meets my husband. This lawyer is a former cop in the town we live in. He is attractive and well built. Bill is going to be floored when he meets him.
I will keep you posted and thank you.
Hugs.
All I know is I feel free for the first time in many years. I feel free to know that If I keep moving forward I will learn to love myself again.
Thank you Lori47