Families & Friends Of Addicts Support Group

Addiction affects more than just the individual. This community is dedicated to the families and friends of individuals suffering from any form of addiction. Mental health professionals are increasingly considering alcoholism and addiction as diseases that flourish in and are enabled by family systems. Family members react to the addicted person with particular behavioral...

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marg6300 09/17/2012

Nope he won't be there, when my son was missing from his sober living house the roomate who was letting him try our his scooter, called the police rightfully so. My son was found and had already sold his housemates scooter and bought crack. He was arrested with crack. I know nothing other then my heart is shattered into a million pieces again cause he had been doing so well this time. And I had to tell his sister she would not get to see him at her wedding. This time was different, this time we had all gotten really close and had seen glimpes of Justin we had not seen in forever and therefore our hearts are torn apart all over again.
But the plus side is he didn't get to get really sick again he was caught before the cycle started all over again and this time when he is locked up he is going to remember his family and how much we love him and we had happy memories this time
and I held my breath every day and knew this would happen but I just wanted more time with him.... I had him back for a minute but I wanted it to be longer,,,,

katrinka 09/17/2012

I'm glad he was found. I hope you let the system handle him and let him pay for all damages and take responsibility for his own actions.
It hurts to have a glimmer of hope and then it is taken away. He may get back on track. I hope so for all involved.
Hugs

jainlor 09/17/2012

i am soo so sorry. i have tears and heartache for you. praying strength for your days ahead my dear friend xoxo

cardinal39 09/17/2012

Marge,,, well at least he was found alive,,,, let the system take control,,, just enjoy your daughters wedding,,, everything happens for a reason,,,, time to focus on her,,,,

Love ya girl!

kimpalmer 09/17/2012

Hi Marg... I am sorry for your pain.. I know it doesn't make that any better when I say, but now he is safe... from drugs. Keep us posted as to what happens next.. adding my hugs too.

deehigs 09/17/2012

marge I completely understand. I am sorry I really am but he is alive and those good memories may well serve to be a good motivator when he gets out. I know it's hard but don
t give up hope! Hugs and prayers Dee

deleted_user 09/17/2012

I am glad you at least know where and how he is so you can focus on your daughter's wedding - such a special time!

beantown 09/17/2012

I'm so sorry. I know how much you must be hurting. We hope so hard and invariably our hopes are dashed. But that is the nature of this beast. Yet every time it happens we are a little stronger than the last time, and that is comfort in itself. I pray he gets a little stronger too. Hang in there and be strong.

dmatt124 09/17/2012

I'm so sorry for your pain. Marg, remember the happy moments and thank god he is alive. I know he can back on track. Don't give up hope.

Pen125 09/18/2012

It's good that he got caught before the cycle started all over again. You have to be strong and by that I mean not to expect but to hope. Does this make sense to you?

I'm not on DS as before because I am planning my wedding. This time, I know better as to not expect anything regarding my brother being there. I had told him -before all hell broke lose and he left home for good- that he is to attend the wedding only if he is OK. I had him swear to be honest with me so that I could help him. He swore he was honest.

What happened next left me crashed for months. Not only wasn't he sober, not only he did lie to everyone, but he chose to inform us about his heroin addicted g/f's pregnancy while we were booking our reception venue. The wedding was cancelled and instead of celebrating life and joy that August with my family, a baby was being born going through withdrawals and my brother was at his worst, fully blown addict not staggering, looking like junk, an absolute waste of life.

This post is dragging, but I have to tell you this: it took me over two years to accept the fact that my brother will not be part of my wedding. My parents still have trouble with the idea and they caused me grief when I told them that unless he is back in the world of the living, he is not invited. Besides, I haven't seen him since 2010. It will be almost 3 years till my wedding date.

Be there for your daughter. She deserves to have your attention, she needs a mommy hug and an "it's going to be great". Trust me, it's going to help you too.

I hope this was just a relapse.

blueviolet725 09/18/2012

I am so sorry. I am glad he was caught early...and he has seen sobriety.
My son missed my daughter's wedding for jail in may, and her reception in late july for rehab....but he was alive, and we didn't have to worry about him with drinks at either event.
Try to focus on the wonderful day for your daughter and be present in the moment. don't let the disease take that away from you.
Hugs to you. blessings on your children and for a wonderful wedding.

marg6300 09/18/2012

OK so I had my 24 hours to cry and be devastated, Went to sleep crying woke up crying..... ENOUGH!!! back to life. Yes my daughter needs me and My husband said Marg we NEED you to be the STRONG one here and we can't have you fall apart right now. And he is so right. So for now my pain and agony are going on the back shelf. I am the mother of the bride and I need to pull myself together. Justin is safe in a decent jail geting meds and only had a small amount on him so will probably get 6 months. I have not seen or spoken to him my friend has insiders to keep me posted.
We are all going to be OK and I am refusing to let this ruin what is planned to be a spectacular day for our family!! Thank you all for the words of comfort I KNOW all of you want nothing but the best for me and all of us on this site.... I will keep you posted and I actually feel bad for Justin cause I KNOW he did not want to do this, drugs are the devil and they have my son. Please keep praying for him he needs it so much!
Marg

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