Families & Friends Of Addicts Support Group

Addiction affects more than just the individual. This community is dedicated to the families and friends of individuals suffering from any form of addiction. Mental health professionals are increasingly considering alcoholism and addiction as diseases that flourish in and are enabled by family systems. Family members react to the addicted person with particular behavioral...

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marg6300 11/04/2013

So I went to the jail yesterday to pick up Justin excited that he was finally going to go into the treatment program we had both agreed upon. I even brought his sister and little nephew to surprise him as he kept saying how much he missed them. Only he left before I got there and I have not heard from him.. Arghhhh I knew this could happen and I kept telling myself I would be fine weather he went to treatment or not but the truth is I'm super hurt and dissapointed again.. How am I supposed to have Faith and hope but also protect my heart so I don't feel so much pain everytime everything falls apart? I honestly don't think its possible. I'm actually mad at myself for feeling so upset! I'm supposed to be practicing detachment and getting my life together and yet I feel so bummed..

cardinal39 11/04/2013

Where there life,, there is hope,, you must remember your son is an addict,, until he has had enough,, he will not get help,, unfortunately jail is not rock bottom for some, they get food everyday, and a place to sleep,,,, momma, take a deep breath,,, I wish we could all gather in one place to encircle you with our physical strength,,

deehigs 11/04/2013

Marg. don't be so hard on yourself you are a wonderful mom who has put in so much effort in so many ways to try and help Justin. I think it is perfectly normal to feel disappointed, you are human with human emotions and you are doing the best you can with one if the most difficult things there is to deal with in life. Detaching to a certain degree is helpful but no matter what he is your son you love him and want the best for him so I think it would be impossible not to feel like you do right now. I'm sorry you are going through this again I really am. Hang in there Marg I'm here for you. Hugs Dee

blueviolet725 11/04/2013

Oh, so disappointing! I feel bad too. I feel angry as well. Well, you hoped for the best, and you are handling the bad junk just fine. We are moms, and no matter what, we would feel sad if this happened to any of us. You are processing it, so you are doing just fine.

Detaching for me is allowing him to make his own decisions, and live with the results...it is putting him in God's hands...it doesn't mean we don't feel hurt. It means we go on and live every day to its best with out letting the hurt stop us. (doesn't mean it can't know the wind out of us every once in a while.) Hugs to you, my friend. so sorry.

jainlor 11/04/2013

I think it is really normal to feel disappointment again. you are a mother. could he have gone on his own? prayers xoxo

Pen125 11/04/2013

I'm sorry if this is a dumb question, but can't you contact him?

kimpalmer 11/04/2013

I am sorry sweetie! Don't beat yourself up though.. That detachment thing is wayy easier when they are in a controlled environment.. When it is all up on your face it is easy to feel flattened.. Please keep us posted as things transpire.. Love you

marg6300 11/05/2013

Pen I can't contact him because he does not have a phone. He has nothing...

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