SO, as my 'plight' goes on with my son.....I HAVE seen many positive changes...THIS I believe is his finally getting to the point of 'I'm SICK of living like this...." homeless, couch hopping, and finally reaching the END of his 'chits' with friends...they've pretty much had enough of him....not that he doesn't help them out, not monetarily but with things like cleaning, yada yada yada....BUT I've been getting the calls 'can i spend the night...' and I've said NO over and over. Now the NEXT thing will blow your mind...

Last night, I left for work, and my hubby was at home, our son called with the 'can i spend the night....' and my HUBBY said YES, THIS AFTER he just asked me if I wanted to take off for a couple days and go snowmobiling for a couple days and I said YES! I was in my car and LIVID....I called my son, let HIM have it, and after telling me what was happening, I said ONE NIGHT and when you get here, you are STAYING IN for the night, not going ANYWHERE with ANYONE. THEN in the morning we are sitting down and plotting HOW your going to get everything together and settle your ass down!" He was agreeable to that and wanted to spend time with his step dad.....Then I get a call he is NOT spending the night and that we are going snowmobiling, THIS AFTER 2 hours of me being pissed. I was LIVID again, I called my son and he was upset that he 'ruined' our two day trip and found a place to stay.....I told him I was SICK and DAMN tired of the calls, the flip flopping like a politician and THIS needs to stop NOW! I also told my husband this: "I JUST told you how PROUD of myself I was that I have DRAWN the line with our son about staying here, he KNOWS his boundaries and I leave for 5 minutes and you say YES to the kid! WHY would you do that?".....

SO, needless to say at 3:30am the hubby took off for the north country and I told him I did not want to go. It is not my 'thing' anyways...at my age now, I don't 'feel the need for speed' anylonger LOL....so off he went, here I sit....

And I told him what my plan is. My son has his retirement plan money coming, he has help from the VA to get him settled and I am TAKING CONTROL of it all so he doesn't squander it and end up BROKE as usual....I will help him find a rental, guide him how to do it....and then he needs to find a job in that area.....I'm DONE with it all and although I may be 'slipping' from my boundaries at this point, I'm seeing that light at the end of the tunnel and I'm going to take a stand to help him, hoping that he sees that although he has pissed me off for the last time, I just want him (as he puts it) out of my hair and settled in one place with a bed, pillow and IF he is lucky I MIGHT let him put the flat screen that we gave him for xmas in as well..LOL...

But THIS is it, he either sinks or swims...I will NOT give him any money....

My gut has really been my guide and my gut has a really good feeling after yesterday spending the day with him...he has changed in his emotional resolution to issues, where before he would just explode or talk crazy.....there was no crazy talk, no irrational behavior....even some things that caught me off guide to say 'hmmm, now THIS is the kid I remember and haven't seen in years!".....

I TRULY believe that his new GF is a HUGE part of this, she is adorable, she has an issue of her own, not drug or alcohol related, but the difference between the OLD gf (that lil (insert really bad word here)#*&$&#)and this GF it is a GALAXY of difference.....how they talk to each other, how they communicate....amazing....and they want to live together (which they have really been doing for the past few months) and I think they will be very good for each other....she doesn't put up with his crap and he listens to her....tee hee hee...and NO I'm not paying her! LOL...

So today, I am taking the reigns and helping guide him on his path to get his crap straight....arg....but on the flip, it feels good to have the 'relationship' starting to build again.