if we take a minute to visualize the lines in the road,, when we drive,,, it simply keeps from chaotic mess happening,,,,, well it's the same in how we deal with addicits,,,,, unfortunately there are no gray areas in an addicit mind,,, reasoning means nothing to them,,,,, I thought I would but together a list of boundaries,, just to remind us:

1, say what you mean and mean what you say,,, ex,,, empty threats are maeaningless,,,, and giving another chance will just keep going on,, and on,, and on,,

2, these are rules, and this is what we are sticking to

3,, do not do for the addicit,,, that they are able to do for themselves

4, do not make excuses for the addicit

5 never give money, credit card( no matter what the "story" is

6.yes addicition is a disease,,,, but until they choose to want to get help,,, it will never be arrested

7, the addicit does not own, or control us,,,

8, can't find a job, I'm depressed,,, life is hard,,, sorry but those are all bullcrap excuses,,,

9. we no longer can be part of you drug world,,, your more then welcome,,,, if you want to be part of our world,,,

10, expectations are let downs,,,,,,

11 there is no such thing as perfection,,, however progress is a blessing

12,, in order to have peace,,, we must create the peace,,, yelling, screaming, only adds to the blood pressure raising,,, really the addict has manipulated you,,, and now your the one with the problem

13,, keep all conversation to 15 words,,,, everything word after,, is either repeated,,, or they have since tune us out,,,, extra words,,, allow the addicit to take those words out of context,,, and soon we are the ones at fault,,,

14,, there are consequences to every behavior,,, we has non-addicit deal with this daily,,, therefore,,, the addicit also must be held accountable,,,,


please add on to anything that may work in your situation,,,,,,

until the addicition becomes worse then the pleasure of the drug,,, the addicit has no reason to quit,,,,,

I've set, and stood firm to the boundaries,,, we created ( my daughter,, was part of the list,, and signed the contract, so there was no hidden deeds,,, she knew if she used,,, she choose to leave) coming up this sept 7, it will be a year,,, the hardest thing I ever did in my life,, and I continue to pray, and practice it everyday,,, today,, granted I have not heard from her since,,, May 8,,, but I must say I'm ok with it,,,, I've surrended her to my higher power,, I find courage and support to live the most joyful, happy life I can,,,,, there are two possible end results,,, and I'm ok with both of them,,,,,, I've spendt too many years,,, consume with trying to fix my daughter,,, that I no longer reconginzed myself,,, it's unfair to me,, and the rest of my family,,,,,, My daughter knows that we love her,,, if and when she comes home,,, my arms are open wide,,, and will love her unconditionally,,,, my number has not changed, and she at any point could reach out to me,,,,,

Its not about the storm,( because the addicition will always be there,,,) but I'm done allowing it to ruin my joy,,,, so I'm dancing in the rain!!

peace!!