I'm so sorry to hear about your daughter. My husband was an alcoholic. I chose to force him to leave our home because he was a nasty abusive drunk. He left emotional scars on me and my 2 kids. He died from his disease; chose to not get help. I thought I could make him get help...I threatened, threw away found bottles, and explained over and over what he was doing to our family. It fell on deaf ears. I realized I cannot change him or make him get help....he has to want to change and get the help.

It's so hard, but the best thing you can do for your daughter is to get her out on her own (if she isn't already). She cannot reach her bottom with you as a safety net. That's not saying that she will reach her bottom; my spouse's bottom was death.

We tend to not tend to our own needs while trying to do the juggling act of "supporting" the addict. Take care of you!

I kicked my daughter out over 3 weeks ago. Yesterday I realized that nothing has changed with her. It just showed me that she isn't ready to change. She chose to go to the emergency room for drugs instead of going to a narcotics meeting. On Saturday I said in would meet her for lunch, but if she showed up high I would leave. Well she showed up high and I left. The addiction to the drugs is winning at this point. And I'm very angry at her. I have wasted so much of my time on this issue while she has done nothing to change. How could I let one person rule my life. Its a new day and yesterday was a real eye opener

it's a horrible situationthis isn't what we wanted for our kids. But they are the only ones who can fix their issues with substances. My son (who's recently out of rehab) said mom you can't fix anyone but yourself. She has to see that it's a problem. You know all of this, as do I, but it doesn't make it any easier. No amount of worrying, being angry and all of the other stuff that goes along with having a child with a substance abuse issue will make it go away. I'm a wreck now that he's home, but I keep telling myself all of this worry isn't going to stop him if he really wants to use. I feel for you. Hugs.

I am glad to hear that you are helping your self, it took me a very long time to understand that concept and it wasn't until I did that I was able to be in control of my life, and make smart choices for me and my family.

Thank you all for the support. It certainly is a difficult time. But I'm attending alanon and trying to get myself straighten out. Some days I still feel very depressed and sad. However she has to want to change. There is peace in the house no more drama which is a blessing. I found myself unable to talk with my family. Especially my husband. It can be very lonely

So glad you found this support group! It's hard to talk about our addicts to people who either don't have any clue what to say, or don't want to hear it or worse try to give unsolicited advice. Sometimes you just need to bend someone's ear ya know?!

We are here for you when you need someone who is in your shoes.

Tough love is the hardest thing to do but you've got to take care of yourself.

Big hugs and prayers