I am a mother of a drug addict she has stolen from me, my husband, her father, brother, children, toher family members, retailers, employers even her own drug dealer. I am raising her children I took them away from her 4 years ago. I have paid for two 2year inpatient rehabs which she was kicked out of both for breaking the rules. I have let her be homless.She can not keep a job, a car, a place to live or a drama free live for more than 6 moths. All the while she claims her sobriety. Easter Sunday she caused drama here at the house then next day I find a email of hers on my phone after letting her use it to check emails thats states she is using drugs. I forward it to myself and she finds out hacks into my emails deletes it and changes my password and again all the while claims her sobriety.I have stopped all visits until I can move them to a safe program. The only reason that I still let her see the boys is because I am trying to lessen the feeling of abandonment they may have later in life. the 4year old doesnt even know she is his mommy because he has been when me since he was 2 months old. My 8year wants to see his mother misses his mother so I let him see her under close supervisen. I am tired and dont have much hope that she will ever change. She will seem to be good for a little while and then everything blows up and she is always the victum. I disconnected with love a long time ago but here I am still loosing sleep everytime things blow up.
I need peace back in my live. I had never seen the inside of a jail,rehab,or alnon until I was thrown into this live.I had not known about drugs, addicts, rehabs. I know I am crying over spilt milk but I am tired, lost and hopeless. I want it to stop. Let me just raise my boys without all the drama, that is what I hope to gain with this last disconnect.