Part of addiction is it tells you you don't have a disease. Denial feeds into that as well. It's real tough for someone in the middle of it to use the common sense that others have to see what's wrong. And of course, being high tells a person that they are just fine. There are many ways the addiction works against a person's getting well. It's a wonder anyone does. All we can do is hope and offer help when the time is right.....

When you really think of it, isn't it the hardest thing addict or not to look deep inside ourselves and admit that we need to change. So now we add mind altering narcotics or alcohol and the ability to have clarity is almost impossible. When an addict is recovering it is not just about not using it is about changing their life, and that takes time.

The above two are right. I think of it like a devil inside their brain telling them lies like "It really isn't so bad" "Oh, you can stop whenever you want"
They begin to fear , even more, feelings. good or bad.
that is why they call it the insanity of addiction.

Have you ever tried to diet and although you knew you shouldn't eat something you said to yourself, "this one time won't hurt!" That is how the addictive brain works except when it evolves drugs or alcohol the ramifications are very bad. So although the person may say they do not want to use drugs another part of their brain is saying go ahead and use. For some addicts the brain is screaming use drugs and this is why it is so very hard for them to stop.

It's hard for a non-addict to wrap their heads around.

the logical part of me wonders how a person can even use the first time, considering all the information out there about the consequences of drugs. And that part of me wonders how a people can choose to do that to themselves. It's tough to not be judgmental and think of addicts as people who chose a wrong path, and continue to do so.

But I think the main part of the very definition of addiction is when people continually choose to do things that all logic would say is against their better judgment and detremental to their future well being. That includes not just drugs or irresponsible consumption of alcohol, but gambling, overeating, risky relationships, spending too much money, etc. And addicts keep doing it, and I would bet most of them know deep down it is hurting them. I think for many or most addicts, the addiction is rooted very deep into their personality, and that is something very difficult to change.

Addiction changes the brain chemistry. Addicts work with their "lizard brain" that is centered on animal instincts. The addiction mostly shuts down their ability to think with the rational part of their brain that thinks logically and understands consequences.

An active addict only has a very short time when they are not high. That's not enough time for the brain to heal and allow them to think with the part of the brain that thinks logically. it's only a short time before they start getting physical cravings and their animal instinct kicks in to do whatever it takes to get the drug. That's when we see they are willing to lie, cheat, steal and do other things they would not normally do in order to get the drug. The part of the brain with a conscience is not working.

Thanks guys i really appreciate your prospective on things, i think i seek understanding so i don't feel angry or disappointed and so i don't judge them i want to feel hopeful your comments really helped.