Cops are called by family members or friends who realize a person is in the act of suicide or has a serious plan. I don't know why they would "surround" a house unless the person had a weapon or a hostage. If that's the case there's usually an officer trained in hostage negotiation or in an attempt to talk the person out. I guess it's possible a person could be pushed to the limit by this but it certainly isn't the cause. The cops were at my house several times because my daughter either had serious plans for suicide or had taken pills. They are usually very kind and comforting and try to get the person into an ambulance with the least possible trauma to the individual.

When my ex was at his worst he was running around the house with a loaded gun. He wanted to die and wanted the cops to shoot him. They surrounded his house, shot out the lamps out front, had a helicopter circling around...I thought for sure he was going to panic and shoot himself. He was terrified as I pleaded on the phone to put the gun away and come outside. It took about an hour for the cops to get into the house and get the gun away from him. They were not very nice about it, slammed him against cop car, and put the handcuffs on super tight. Even after I had explained that his medication had been changed 2 days prior and he wasn't doing well. There wasn't any compassion for his illness. I understand they were trying to protect themselves, but come on.

Elanie,
I read you post while I was searching for a Survivor Group. I felt like I needed to post something. Usually I NEVER post anything. Your post compelled me to write for two reasons. First is Im a police sergeant in Texas.

Second, my wife died of suicide just less than two weeks ago. This is the first time Ive spoken to any strangers about it.

The police perspective. Every Officer has a duty to make it home at the end of the shift. But every officer I know holds life to the highest level. Sunnieboo is right in that if someone is threatening to harm themselves with a firearm, the police presence is remarkably more authoritarian. They not only have a duty to themselves but to the community as a whole. No one knows what the person inside is gonna do.

When I found my wife on the floor it was my fellow officers that have surrounded me with their support and love.
In my 15 years as a Police Officer, I have never been at a scene where someone killed themselves after being surrounded. Does it happen, Yes it does. I don't believe that the stats would show that it is a common occurrence.
I cant and wont comment about what happened in Sunnieboos case. I wasnt there. I do know that I have had to use force or threaten to use force to intervene in someones plan to harm themselves before. But by force, I DON'T mean deadly force against a suicidal person.
And if I would have been there, I would have used force to prevent my wife from doing it too...

Hope this has helped you.
I feel it's helped me for a moment.

ElGuapo,

So sorry to hear of your wife's suicide.

There were no weapons involved in my friend's situation.

Elanie,
Thank you for your support and condolence.

Without a weapon but surrounded by people it could have easily been firemen or medics that pushed your friend.

My feeling is, in my wifes case, in ur friends case, is that they had already made up their minds to do it.

My wife cut her wrists a week or so before. She was in hospital. Released to me a few days later. On meds. I tried to get her to a mental health hospital. She kept telling me a few days later. Let the meds work. Got her to see her shrink. Thought FOR SURE the shrink would put her in. Nope. 2 days later......

Found out later she agreed to counseling and group therapy. Psychiatrist said she was making plans for the future, etc.

I think the only plan she was committed to was doing it right.

Sorry for your loss Elanie and letting me share my experience. My point was that being surrounded could have contributed to what happened. We will never know what drives someone to suicide. They seem to have their minds made up.

BTW, I was wasn't implying that all law enforcement was bad, or that they all act this way. I was just sharing what my experience was with one particular group in a difficult city.

hugs.

My estranged husband was caught in the midst of his attempt, by a couple of friends who learned of his plan. They came to the house knowing what he had planned, with the church group. He was locked in the bathroom. did they call 911, to get people who are trained to deal with people on the edge? No. He shot himself in the head in the bathroom while they were all praying on it. Nuff said. I wish they had surrounded our house, come in and negotiated. Maybe he'd still be here.

(((gentle hugs 2 all)))) my son's girlfriend, towards the end of his life did call Law Enforcement. In his case, Daniel was very combative, refused to open the door and threatened the police officers who were only trying to help him !!! I was on the phone one day when the officers came to his door and he informed them they had no right to come into his home and to go away. Dan was committed to carrying out his suicide. I believe he wanted to do sucide by police :( Sad but true. In the end, he did finish the act. Leaving so many of us lost and hurt. He was only 23 yrs old. For some the hardest thing is "What could I have done to stop this?" I went through that too. In the end, I know, there was NOTHING I, nor anyone could do. Thanks for letting me share here.