Hi Recluse,
How long were you and your husband together before the sex stopped? I ask because people often report that around 3 years is when married sex starts declining. #1 reason? Kids. If you don't have kids, it's often work/financial related (for partners of either sex).
I'm curious because I'm actually facing a similar problem, although not on the same scale.
Did you have a happy sex life before? It sounds as if you're finally losing interest in sex due to lack of availability. You're obviously frustrated but are your urges focused toward him, or is it just general horniness? You mentioned you can't even gratify yourself. It sounds like you've become disconnected from your own desires.
In my experience people who are already stressed are turned off by being pressured for sex. Even a even playful attempt at seduction can feel like an indirect reminder that he's failing you as a lover. So when you pursue your husband, try to avoid reminding him that he's not meeting your needs.
You said he won't let you touch him. Does he express other types of affection towards you? If not he needs to have a serious conversation about whether he is still aroused by you. If not, I hope he figures out why. In the end it may have everything to do with him and nothing to do with you. Honesty is the key. No one should be afraid to be honest with their spouse about things like this. Intimacy isn't possible between people who are afraid to be assertive or vulnerable with each other.

I understand how you feel. I've been with my girlfriend for 20 years, and since she's been through menopause, she's​ lost all interest in sex. We use to do it three times a day. We haven't had sex in eight years and I've been Masturbating every night. Sometimes for an hour. Sometimes I can't even get it up and sometimes I can't cum.

HI Recluse, have you tried talking to your husband to find out why he doesn't want to or why he has no interest in sex? In a normal healthy male that's a long time to go especially when with a partner not to be sexual. Why if you guys were active before did it stop? Open and honest communication is the best way to discuss the issues and both be able to share what they are feeling.

Nothing wrong with masturbating even when with a partner but if that's all your doing to get satisfaction and release all the time sounds like a big problem. Have you tried counseling?

All the best and hope things get better.
Gary