I had to quit my job as a hairstylist last week because of my seizures that I have had for 7 years ( was having the feeling before a seizure all day long or having a seizure or several daily. I have been diagnosed with pseudoseizures in the past, but low blood pressure is also causing symptoms. Having trouble getting a referral from my doctor to see a cardiologist or neurologist. I have a hard time getting out of bed, getting ready or dressed or anything, I am not driving at all because I don't feel it is safe to. I have been feeling dizzy all day long, sitting and standing still feel dizzy and if I lay down I am dizzy with a headache. My vision has blurred several times in the last week, been seeing grey spots, and a feeling of blood rushing in my head and a numb/ tingly mask of pressure feeling on my face. Also chest pains. I had seizure activity as a child that showed up on an EEG but nothing shows up since. I am not convinced completely that these are pseudoseizures. I have seizures when I am not stressed too. The doctor also had sad possibly tonic clonic? About to file for disability...I don't know what else to do. I feel helpless and dependent on everyone around me. My husband is about to start working a second job with double time and working on his days off. I feel like such a burden. Sometimes I feel like I want to step into traffic, although that is unlikely I am afraid to take the bus or walk anywhere because of the possibility of someone taking advantage of me during a seizure or calling an ambulance (we can't afford anymore fruitless ambulance trips or 6-8 hr hospital stays.) We have also dealt with infertllity and a miscarriage in May as there had been months with no or very few seizures for a long time. We tried last month when I was healthier and now I could be pregnant. My husband is scared to have children with me that I would need a full time caregiver for myself and a baby. I want nothing more than to have children. I take care of myself every day I am alone here all day and I think people with seizures can take care of children and themselves with safety measures in place (I have a 12 year old daughter from a previous relationship that doesn't live with us) me full time. For me I try to get stuff done around the house despite not feeling well. I eat every couple hours and I am alone and taking care of myself most of the time when I have seizures I always seem to have 15 min or more before a seizure. I can't work right now, at least not a conventional job. This is not the life I wanted and I am having trouble accepting this as a reality. I'm not religious but "grant me the serenity" has become my mantra.