Hi,

I haven't been on this site for a couple of years. And today I thought about it and wondered if my account still existed. I had to reset my password because I couldn't remember my old one.

And when I opened up the site, I see your post first, and it made me think there is a reason I signed on. Because I have had a couple of lap surgeries and I am able to reassure you and hope that others will as well.

I too have a fairly hefty dose of anxiety (have ever since childhood) and medical procedures make me very nervous.

But I want to tell you that the lap surgeries I have had turned out to be relatively easy to deal with. There is the bonus of not having a large incision to heal from.

I can understand your angst if you've never had a surgery before. It is very understandable to be worried about having anesthesia simply because it's a new experience.

I am 44 and have had several surgeries in my life. And I will tell you that for each and every one, I have always found the pre-op nursing staff and the post-off nursing staff to be top notch (regardless of the hospital I have been at--and I have been at different ones).

It seems that they are always the kindest, most compassionate people to help you through the process.

My personal experience has always been that the angst before a surgery always ended up outweighing my anxiety when I actually arrived at the hospital -- perhaps because anticipatory anxiety is my biggest issue.

Maybe you will find your experience to be the same as well. That thinking about it ahead of time was the worst part. I know I don't do well with waiting so having to wait for something I am nervous about is difficult.

I too would wring my hands and cry to my husband in the days and weeks leading up to surgeries. With time, this became less and less because I knew better what to expect.

The goal with pre-op and post-op staff is always to make the patient feel comfortable. They know that any human being is nervous to some extent about surgery. And they really do an amazing job to help you feel more at ease.

My sister (she is a couple years older than me) used to have lifelong anxiety about anesthesia. And waking up. (not waking up--that sort of thing as you reference)

She has had a couple of surgeries in recent years and has gotten through it swimmingly.

As for laparoscopic procedures themselves---it is a relatively easy thing to recover from. I can compare it because I have also had a full-incision abdominal surgery.

And they are worlds apart. A full incision is much more painful and takes a lot lot longer to recover from.

With laparoscopy, the incisions are so tiny that it is not very painful incision-wise to recover from. As I'm sure you've read online, oftentimes there is (naturally) trapped gas left in your abdomen from the procedure --- and usually that is the most of the "discomfort" that you will feel.

I have had at least a couple of laparoscopies and would go through another in a heartbeat if I needed to.

Both times I had some minor discomfort in the days that followed in terms of gas pains. Often you can take Gas-X for this to help. It also helps (strange as it may sound) to rock in a rocking chair. Or even ride in a car. That helps work the gas out of your system.

For me it wasn't anything terribly significant.

And you might be tired for a couple days as the anesthesia takes time to get out of your system.

If you have never had anesthesia before, it will be helpful to talk to the anesthesiologist (the day of the surgery) about your concerns. And they can hopefully include some anti-nausea medications in the mix for you.

I have found these to be very helpful. (I had my wisdom teeth extracted in 1991 and had vomiting afterwards. It wasn't the worst thing. It just wasn't ideal.)

So I learned from that experience that yes I get nauseous from anesthesia so now they always make sure I am well loaded up on anti-nausea medication whenever I have anesthesia.

Last couple times, they have put a scopalomine patch (transfermal patch that delivers medicine) behind my ear to help with that. And it has worked wonderfully.

I think a lot of your fears, as you've said, are anxiety based. And I can fully relate to that. No judgment here at all.

So it's important to remind yourself of that. That if you worry they are going to find cancer or something awful as you've suggested here---that it is just an anxious thought you are having. It's not a premonition.

I hope you don't cancel the procedure. You are strong and can get through this.

Oh and I too have endometriosis. I didn't even know I had it. But I kept getting large ovarian cysts (which turned out to be endometriomas) and because of ovarian involvement, I was diagnosed with Stage IV endometriosis after my first lap in 2012.

Let me know if you have any other questions. I will keep you in my thoughts for 1/15.

~K

Oh my gosh, I love that you felt compelled to come online today! I think you weren’t meant to read my plea for reassurance.

Thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart for the long, detailed reply. Can’t tell you how much it means to me! Of course I’ve been scouring the internet only to find very scary stories. I turned 30 in September, my husband and I have been trying to concieve for 2.5 years and it’s been a long, exhausting road I never imagined we’d have to go down. I’m actually hoping the do find some endo and clear it out so we can finally have some answers.

The part I’m most afraid of is waking up after surgery and feeling strange. I just pray I have an easy time with everything so we can move on. I’m going to read through your response again and will let you know if I have any questions. Thank you again so, so much! <3

I'm so glad the timing of me logging in the other day worked out so well. Some things really are meant to be.

I agree that sometimes when we scour the Internet (an activity that is almost impossible to resist when we're anxious sometimes) we only read horror stories.

The truth is for just about anything in life you can probably google it and find a horror story. But that doesn't mean it's representative of what is typical or what you can most likely expect from your own experience.

I understand completely about the long and exhausting road of trying to conceive.

I also remember turning 30 (that was almost 15 years ago) and being really sad on my birthday. Because we didn't have a child yet. But by 32 I was pregnant.

Sometimes things don't happen on the timetable that we hope for. But that doesn't mean that they won't eventually happen.

At the same time I understand that me saying something like that can sound very empty when I know all too well the toll it takes on a person to go through this experience.

If only we had crystal balls and could know things for sure.

I don't think you will necessarily feel strange after waking up from surgery. Just groggy and likely relatively relaxed from the medications.

I have had some surgeries where I've woken up and had some disorientation. But the nurses have always been very compassionate with that.

They are used to seeing everything under the sun. And they will take good care of you.

When I woke up from a laparoscopic surgery in 2012 -- that's when I found out I had endo. I had no idea I had it. They were just going in to remove an ovarian cyst.

The one thing I don't like about how I was diagnosed was that I literally had just come to and the dr. (who had been a really nice guy otherwise) was showing me surgery photos of the endo and had a really sad face and said it's Stage IV.

I feel he handled the diagnosis moment so poorly. He looked so grim and if I could do it all over (had I known this upon-waking diagnosis could even happen) I would have made my preference stated ahead of time.

That I want to find out after I've been awake for a bit.

So I do feel he handled that poorly. BUT I share this with you to give you hope.

Because he presented the diagnosis SO grimly to me. And had nothing great to offer me. Just said the best I could hope for (this was when we were hoping to have another child--I was now 39 years old at the time) was to take Lupron (which in my opinion is a horrible drug that should be avoided, period) and then take ovary stimulating drugs after going off Lupron and hope to get pregnant.

I told him I didn't think Lupron was a good idea for me. I have a long-standing history of severe depression and I know Lupron puts you into immediate menopause. Many women have a hard time on that drug. Massive mood swings and a whole list of other side effects.

He told me that I "just need to have the right mindset about it. It's mind over matter."

That's when I lost trust in him. Because no one in their right mind should recommend a drug like that to someone who has a long-standing history of mood issues.

So I decided he was no longer for me nor were his recommendations.

And I decided to find an acupuncturist who was highly reputable. I found one who was an MD and it was really the best find truthfully.

No one was talking about shutting down my hormones and hyperstimulating my ovaries.

Instead, I found myself in a new chapter of life where I was seeking out more holistic approaches.

I never had any subsequent surgeries for the endo. I just had that ovarian cyst removed in Jan. 2012.

I then embarked on 2x/week acupuncture with moxibustion AND also Chinese herbs prescribed by the acupuncturist who is also a Chinese herbalist.

I tried other things too, but I found these things worked the best for me. Within a few months I felt the best physically and emotionally I had truthfully ever felt in my life.

We did see a reproductive endocrinologist for a number of consults. I never had anything invasive done. Just the saline test to make sure my tubes were not blocked. They weren't.

I don't have any adhesions from the endo. It's only considered Stage IV b/c of ovarian involvement.

So the RE we went to was very optimistic and actually recommended no surgery, no Lupron, etc.

And we did get pregnant later that year, again the following year and again later that same following year.

I kept having pregnancy losses,however. But I want to emphasize that the RE (who is highly reputable--he's one of the pioneers here actually--Dr. Goldfarb) --- never felt that the endometriosis had anything to do with the pregnancy losses.

Likely there is something that is undiagnosable about me. Or more likely, my age. I was in my early 40s at this point.

I did have a number of tests done after the pregnancy losses to rule out autoimmune, clotting disorder, and other issues that they typically see in women with recurrent pregnancy losses.

And everything came back negative.

So it will go down as one of life's mysteries.

I want to emphasize to you that if it does turn out you have Endo----explore all options and get 2nd, 3rd and 4th opinions.

An Endo diagnosis is not an immediate Fertility Death Sentence.

And like you said, oftentimes they can clear it out and give you a green light for getting pregnant.

Maybe it's something as simple as blocked tubes. And often that can be addressed, I think.

Anyway, just wanted to let you know I'm rooting for you for your upcoming surgery. Stay positive. Believe in yourself. You can do this :)

Gosh, again, thank you so much for the reply, had me tearing up!

You clearly understand what a long road this is, it's truly hard to talk to others about it who have had an "easy" journey to getting pregnant.

Luckily I do feel very comfortable with my RE. He is very patient, kind and understanding. He also has a nurse in his office who is a Reiki master and does that for IVF patients! It's refreshing to see them mix modern medicine with holistic approaches. They also refer their patients to acupuncture which I spent the summer doing along with 4 different IUI procedures all with no luck.

Unfortunately acupuncture was hard for me. I really tried to enjoy it, but I just really hate needles and all I could do while I laid on the table was think, "omg I have needles sticking out of me all over the place" and did not find any relaxation in it. I was also extremely stressed out with the IUI procedures we were doing, running into the doctors office for blood work and ultrasounds every other day, so it could have been the stress that was making it so much harder to enjoy. I might consider going back after surgery.

Like you, I have a long history of not depression but severe, crippling anxiety. Mostly health anxiety, where I am constantly thinking a small pain is cancer or the extreme of everything. It is a daily battle that I deal with some days better than others, but it always seems to be waiting for me. Right now it is completely unbearable leading up to the surgery. Every "worst case scenario" outcome is playing over and over in my mind. Of course, I came down with a cold this week and keep reading that if you're sick and getting elective surgery that they may cancel it. I'm beside myself thinking that they might cancel it, I do NOT want to push it off any longer. I left a message for my RE letting him know I have a cold, so hopefully they'll be fine with it and proceed with the surgery. On the flip side though, I don't want the cold to cause anything worse with the surgery.

I'm sure that the anticipation of the surgery is worse than the procedure will actually be. I need to just do my best to stay busy this weekend and go in with a positive attitude, if not just for my husbands sake, he has been an absolute God send through all of this and I owe it to him to put on a brave face and find out what is going on with my body so we can decide how to proceed with growing our family.

Thank you so, so much again for your replies. I hoping and praying that Monday will be a breeze, they will find some mild endo, remove it and we finally have some answers rather than, "unexplained infertility." I will keep you posted! <3

I am pulling for you! I can relate to so much of what you said.

I'm glad you said "Monday" too because while I knew the date was 1/15 -- I think I lost track of dates and didn't realize it was coming up so soon.

It is true that sometimes surgeries are cancelled..but it depends on how sick you are I think. It's smart that you put a call in to your doctor.

I think if there is no fever or significant cough, it may be a non issue.

I always feared the same thing--surgery cancellation after all of the anticipatory anxiety.

I apologize that my reply is short for now. But I did want to let you know I'm rooting for you! And I will write more soon.

I hope all went well yesterday ♥

Hi there, i've had a laparascopy at age 20 for endo. I had terrible pain with endo, and the surgery was honestly less painful than a period for me. As far as being worried about them finding cancer, i'm guessing they did a scan or ultra sound on you prior to deciding on surgery? Cancer would be found on a scan so i'm sure they would have found that by now if it were present. Endometriosis can't be found on any kind of medical imaging, which is why surgery is required to diagnose and treat. The laparoscopy is a very minor surgery. Pain can be relieved with NSAIDS like advil or ibuprofen. Good luck :)

Hi. I just joined this group and saw your post, I hope your surgery went well and stay positive, it actually ended up being the best thing for me when I had one in 2015. Got pregnant the following month after getting "cleared out" -and now have a 19 month old. I hope that happens for you and that you are doing well. It took us two years of trying to get the endo diagnosis

hello9 ladies- How did your procedure go? I am going to be getting this done soon and I want to know what to expect. I am 37 with a 3 and 4 year old. I never thought i would have endo but after having my 2 kids,i have fertility issues now and the day I get my period I have this horrible horrible stabbing pain in the butt. it also is painful to have sex when i ovulate. the dr said it sounds like endometriosis which when i google it that is what it seems like. from 16- till i had my daughter i was on the pill which my dr said controls the endo so maybe that is why i never thought about it before.