So my dr had to cancel on me. Im rescheduled for the 30th. I really dont know if i can last that long. he told me to take the ibprofin if i can if not i have percocet, with phenergan because i throw up a lot. My hubby and I tried to be intimate again yesterday and i just couldnt do it. i mean at all. i feel so bad. he was yelling at me in his sleep tonight of how i am lazy i need a job. tonight he is in the other room with the door locked. all because i wanted to snuggle by him. i started to hurt about an hour ago so i told him i wanted to be near him. he said no made a wall out of covers and pillows. baby. then of course when my pain hits and it never takes long im actually wondering if i have PID again.. I get really hot, dizzy, sick. Sometimes the pain and dizziness is so much i fall think i pass out but im never sure. i have told my dr this so many times which is why is am scared of the percocet because it makes the dizzys worse. but my pain anymore can go from a 4 or 5 to an 8 or 9 in like 20 or 30 minutes. basically how i was in the hospital in january. the nurses would get so mad because i would see how long i could go without demerol so by the time i had pain i had to wait until it was horrible. and i know i sound like a druggie for saying this but when i get my period i would love to have some of that.

i cant sleep right now i took a percocet. got my bowl lol. hubby left but my dog wont leave me alone he thinks he needs to sleep with me. so amazing how they know when you need someone. hubby will be mad at me for staying up this late, so will my counselor but hey ill sleep until noon and make up for it. i bought those heating pads the thermacare ooh my new best friends. the only thing though is it bad to use on a bruise and why if anyone knows. when i have pain my right side down there swells kinda and bruises worse when im on my cycle. secretly i want to tell my dr it feels like im on a horrible period 24/7.

Oh i figured out how to explain to hubby what my pain feels like :P i read it in a book. like someone castrating him with manicure scissors lol. i imagine that would hurt. well im going to cruise the internet some maybe shop a little. i feel like i need to do something for me. i posted both info of PID and Endo on my myspace for my family and friends hopefully some will understand and stop thinking im a nut and i really do hurt.

See you all later sorry this is long. prolly the meds and feeling like you guys are the only ones i can talk to about this. I hope everyones day is marvelous.