I am tring to ask for help and the few steps I take get shot down. I am frustrated and feel like this is a "sign" that I just need to keep fighting alone. I tried to get an appt twice with my doctor. First time, the scheduling wasn't working and second time, her computer was down and she couldn't make appts. I also called a nutritionist/ed counselor and we have been playing phone tag since last week.

I have also mentioned to my parents a few things and they shut down. I am not giong to "beg" for them to listen. My mom mentioned last week that I seemed depressed and I said, "yes, I am". And she did not respond but then distracted herself. I guess I expected a "do you want to talk, how can I help..." something. I also told my dad that I really needed to talk to him after my sister left (she was visiting on vacation). I even told him that I needed him to hold me to this and he said he would. That was 2 months ago. I am divorced, no friends, only my parents as they watch my 8 year old daughter when she gets out of school until I get off of work. I have had a close relationship with my parents. But they seem far away now. I know that over the past year I have isolated from them, due to the developing ed, now I don't feel I can just bring up the topic. However, I think the smallest push would cause me to just spill all.

I feel so alone. I guess I made my bed though...